


Sacrifice

by ohayohimawari



Category: Naruto
Genre: A Shinobi Love Story, Angst and Drama, Angst and Feels, Angst and Romance, Angst with a Happy Ending, Backstory, Canonical Character Death, Character Development, Character Study, Drama & Romance, Eventual Romance, F/M, Female Characters, Female Friendship, For the Era of Peace, Heartbreak, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Kirigakure | Hidden Mist Village, Konohagakure | Hidden Leaf Village, Kumogakure | Hidden Cloud Village, Mostly A Story About Women, Ninja Romance, POV Female Character, Post-Fourth Shinobi War, Romance, Romantic Angst, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Some Humor, Strong Female Characters, The Kunoichi Of Naruto, Travel, Unresolved Romantic Tension, What They Gave Up, Women Being Awesome, World Travel (Narutoverse), landscape porn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-30
Updated: 2019-11-25
Packaged: 2020-07-27 13:28:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 27
Words: 35,615
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20046802
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ohayohimawari/pseuds/ohayohimawari
Summary: As the Godaime Mizukage, Mei Terumi brought much-needed change and lasting peace to Kirigakure. However, it came at great personal cost. With her duty fulfilled, Mei continues to struggle with choices she'd made in the past; choices which continue to shape her future.





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> This story is separate from the Romance of the Retired Kages series.
> 
> This is an idea I've had on the back burner for some time, which I'm finally beginning to write out. I have a lot going on in my life currently so updating may be a bit erratic. As most of my readers know, I typically remain focused on one story at a time and tend to update quickly. I'm not sure that I can maintain that pace with this fic, but I will try. I want to write it as much as I hope people want to read it.
> 
> I welcome feedback from my readers, and I appreciate any and all of the positive comments that you share with me.
> 
> I do not own these characters; I'm having a wonderful time exploring them.

Mei took one last look around the room she’d spent the most years of her life within.

It had been in that room that she learned to trust her own instincts over the counsel of others and realized her strengths. She stood across from the chair where she had signed new laws, had given orders, had enacted the many changes Kirigakure underwent during her time as Mizukage.

Mei stood with one hand on the knob to the office door and one arm hugging a box of the personal items she was bringing home with her. Today it had been her office, her title, but tomorrow they would both belong to Chōjūrō.

The commotion of gathering her personal items had disturbed the dust in the room, and Mei watched as flecks of it floated in the air, caught in the warm light of sunset. It was the most still and quiet her office had ever been, and she found details in the décor that she had never noticed before. She drew in a quick breath as she turned the knob, pulled the door open, walked out, and closed the door quietly behind her.

Mei avoided the escort that waited to take her through the streets of the Hidden Mist Village. With a swish of her dress, she took to the rooftops, leaping from one hanging garden to the next; hiding in them from the bustle of the village center below.

The last rays of sunlight lit a lonely path outside of the village in a dim, orange glow. Mei followed it without thinking until her feet turned to the familiar shortcut that took her to her home. When she reached her door, a figure stepped out of the shadows of the tree nearest to it.

In the almost-dark between the setting sun and rising moon, Mei recognized Tsunade Senju’s blonde pigtails. She carried a large bottle of sake in each hand, and a knowing smile on her lips.

Mei smiled back at her fellow female Kage and friend, glad of her unexpected company for the evening. “Should we even bother with cups?” Mei asked as she opened the door to the other woman.

“Only if you want to wash dishes,” Tsunade replied as she walked through the door into Mei’s home.

Tsunade set the bottles down on a table, then turned on a lamp as Mei locked her door to the night. Mei crossed the room, set her box down on the floor, and sat beside it with her back against the sofa. Tsunade opened both bottles and after handing one to Mei, joined her on the floor on the other side of the box.

She held her bottle up in a toast. “Welcome to retirement, and the ‘what do I do now’ club,” she said dryly, and chuckled.

Mei laughed quietly as she tapped her bottle to Tsunade’s, and both women took a long drink. She sighed after she swallowed and opened the box between them.

Tsunade pulled another swig from her bottle as she looked inside. She lifted a hair comb out and admired it. “This is lovely,” she said as she lowered her bottle.

“It was my mother’s,” Mei replied as she brought her bottle to her lips again.

Tsunade hummed thoughtfully as she carefully set it aside. “Do you have anything from your father too?”

“His forehead protector,” Mei nodded.

Tsunade brought out a small, tattered book and Mei squeaked, snatching it from her hand before she could open it. “That’s an old diary of mine. I haven’t had enough sake to share what’s written in there yet.”

“Oh? Keep drinking then,” Tsunade laughed, and Mei giggled as she laid the old, private journal on the floor next to her.

The pair of women drained their bottles of sake as they continued through the box of Mei’s personal items. Every object had a story that Mei told a little or a lot of, and Tsunade was an attentive listener and observant friend through the telling of each.

After Mei had finished the tale behind a dangerous-looking hole in her old jōnin vest, Tsunade asked, “You served in Kiri’s ANBU too, correct?”

“I did,” Mei said as she swallowed another gulp of sake.

“Kakashi once told me that was how you two first met,” Tsunade leveled her glassy eyes on Mei.

“Is that so?” Mei asked quietly, lowering her gaze to her hands as they held the bottle in her lap.

Mei could feel Tsunade’s eyes still on her when the other woman spoke again. “He’s going to announce his retirement next month.”

“Is he?” Mei lifted her head, but only to take another drink before looking down again.

The two women sat in silence again until Tsunade gently broke it. “There’s still time, you know. Perhaps—”

“No, Tsunade. Please, it was so long ago. I couldn’t, I _wouldn’t_ expect him to forgive me.” Mei interrupted her.

“You were so _young_ then, and it was a much different world. If he didn’t understand then, I’m sure he does now,” Tsunade pressed her.

“That’s asking too much of him. Regardless of how young we were or how different the world was, the fact remains that I refused him. However difficult that was for me,” Mei paused to reign in her thoughts. “I know it hurt him. I wasn’t fair to him.”

“You were offered reasonable advice, and given your position, of course you had to follow it,” Tsunade softened her tone of voice as she tried to comfort her friend.

“I don’t blame them for guiding me, and I don’t blame myself for refusing him. Given the world as it is now and all that we’ve accomplished, I shouldn’t regret the cost.”

Tsunade took another drink without looking away. “Should not and cannot are two different things, Mei. It’s understandable if you regret it anyway.” She reached a hand to clasp one of Mei’s. “I can’t imagine how difficult it has been for both of you to work together. It hurts me to watch you two behave as almost strangers.”

Mei looked up at Tsunade. “I can’t blame him for the distance between us now. However it came about, and for whatever reason, I made a decision. Regardless of what I felt for him then, or what I feel now doesn’t change the fact that I disappointed him. I deserve his indifference.”

“What _do_ you feel now?” Tsunade urged, cautiously.

Mei would have become angry if anyone other than her longtime friend continued to press her. “It doesn’t matter,” she said, ending the conversation and her bottle of sake at the same time.

Mei squeezed Tsunade’s hand. “I’m going to turn in. You know where everything is; you’re welcome to the guest room.” She let go of Tsunade’s hand and collected the old journal as she stood up. “Let’s both enjoy sleeping in tomorrow. I can’t wait to get used to not setting an alarm,” she smiled before heading to her bedroom.

Once she'd settled herself in bed, Mei opened her old, tattered diary to the page that marked the day on which an important choice had been made. The paper was worn and soft, the ink faded from years of wear and tears, but the words had long been etched in her memory before the writing had become illegible.

Mei closed the journal and set it aside before she could finish reading the entry. She turned off the lamp at her bedside and buried her face into her pillow as new tears sprung from an old wound and streamed down her face.


	2. Chapter One

Mei stepped off the train and inhaled the scent of the trees that surrounded the Village Hidden in the Leaves.

The international railway was new, a product of the alliance that had formed shortly before the Fourth Shinobi War. It was _so_ new that it was still being built. Bridges in various stages of construction were beginning to connect the islands of the Land of Water. When completed, they would accommodate the tracks that would continue the international railway to the Hidden Mist Village. For now, however, travel meant that Mei and Chōjūrō went by ferry from island to island, and then finally to the mainland where they could continue by train.

Mei thoughtfully admired each bridge as they sailed past it. She was born into a land that had deliberately closed itself off from the other nations and had been so for generations. But during her time as Mizukage, that had changed drastically. She recalled the red and angry faces of the council elders and the Daimyo as they used tradition and other obsolete arguments against her decisions that would lead the Land of Water into a new era. She smiled at the bridges and the established peace that they represented in quiet triumph.

The journey across the mainland to Konoha had spanned days when she was an ANBU agent, but was now completed in a matter of hours. While the travel was made easier, Mei lamented that there was less to occupy her anxious mind.

Kakashi Hatake had announced his retirement, and tomorrow his named successor would take up the mantle of being Hokage. Dignitaries from all the nations were arriving in Konoha for dinner that evening, and to watch as Naruto Uzumaki achieved his life-long goal the next day.

Mei felt the familiar, stubborn nervousness that she always felt whenever she prepared herself to be in the Rokudaime Hokage’s company. Wondering if he’d speak to her or not, she’d worry either way. She’d scold herself for being affected this way for so many years, and would try to push it aside. However, those agitations would just as quickly return, unbidden and unwelcome; gnawing at her.

“Welcome, Lord Chōjūrō!” Shikamaru Nara’s voice rose above the noise of the crowd, drawing Mei’s attention as well as her companion’s.

The two high-ranking Mist nin made their way to where the Hokage’s assistant stood. Shikamaru had the misfortune of always looking a little harassed, but today it was more pronounced. Mei stifled a giggle at what a ‘troublesome’ time he must be having, greeting and escorting all of the dignitaries as they arrived at Konoha.

“With you here, all of our guests are present. Thank you for coming, Lord Mizukage; Lady Mei.” Shikamaru bowed to them.

Every time Mei heard her title associated with Chōjūrō instead of herself, she smiled a little easier, felt more relieved that it was no longer her role in the shinobi world. “Thank you, Shikamaru,” she returned the bow. “Do we still have time to freshen up before dinner?”

“Only a little, I’ll take you to your quarters now,” Shikamaru replied and turned, beckoning them to follow him.

The village center was bustling owing to the time of day, and crowded because of the celebration planned for the following day. Naruto was an international hero as well as Konoha’s; therefore, many had come to celebrate his inauguration. “May we take a different route?” Chōjūrō asked Shikamaru and Mei could understand why after they’d been jostled by boat and train throughout their travel.

“Of course,” Shikamaru surveyed the streets as he formed his plan. “This way.”

He led them away from the crowds and the market stalls and into a residential neighborhood. They hadn’t continued much further, however, before a very small someone came bounding out of one of the houses that lined the street. “There you are! Come see what I can do!”

“Mirai!” A woman emerged in the doorway and gently scolded the child. “Shikamaru is busy right now,” she turned towards the three as they approached her home.

“It’s alright, Kurenai. I’m sorry I haven’t been to visit you this week, Mirai.”

“Who are they?” Mirai had lost a little of her bravado when she took in the sight of two strangers.

“Mirai!” Kurenai scolded the child again in a hushed whisper as she placed one of her hands on the girl’s shoulder.

“These are shinobi from the Land of Water, Mirai. This is Lord Mizukage and Lady Mei Terumī.”

Mei caught Kurenai’s arresting eyes when they flitted to her with the recognition of her name lit across them as Chōjūrō made an exaggerated bow to the child.

“I never thought I’d welcome a Lord and Lady to my home,” Kurenai recovered, smoothing her hair as she spoke.

“Lord Kakashi comes sometimes.” Mirai looked up to her mother, confused.

“That’s different, dear. He and I and your father went to school together when we were kids, so we’re old friends now. Besides, you know that he doesn’t like to be called ‘Lord.’”

“That’s true,” Mirai conceded. “Anyway,” her excitement returned with the quickness that only belongs to a child as she turned to Shikamaru again. “Watch what I can do!”

Mirai broke from her mother and ran to the tall streetlight that was nearest their three unexpected guests. She brought her hands together and scrunched up her face in concentration as she channeled chakra to the soles of her feet. Then, she charged for the light post and began to run up the side of it.

“Mirai, you’ll mess yourself up just before we have to go to dinner with everyone,” Kurenai said, exasperated.

Whether it was the distraction of her mother’s voice or the fear that she would make a mess of herself, the chakra flow was disrupted, and Mirai fell to the ground below her. She landed with a sickening thud and a muffled cry that signaled an injury more severe than a bump or a bruise.

Mei was nearest to the girl and knelt at her side in a heartbeat. Chōjūrō looked on, and Kurenai wrung her hands as Shikamaru assessed the girl after Mei had gently rolled her over. “A dislocated collarbone. You are very lucky, young lady,” he said to the girl.

Mirai didn’t look like she felt very lucky, her face going green as tears escaped her tightly shut eyes. Perspiration gathered in beads on her brow, and Mei brushed the girl’s hair away from her face in a soothing gesture. “We should lay her in bed before we reset it,” she said gently.

Shikamaru grunted his agreement as he gingerly lifted Mirai from the ground. Mei stood up as well, and the others followed them into Kurenai’s home. Shikamaru laid her down on her bed, Kurenai removed her daughter’s shoes from her feet, and Mei approached Mirai from the side of the bed opposite Shikamaru. She took hold of the girl to keep her still and nodded when Shikamaru asked, “Ready?” Then he pushed Mirai’s collarbone back in place with the experienced swiftness that comes with being a veteran captain of a team of ninja.

Mei and Chōjūrō exited the room with Shikamaru following closely behind, leaving Kurenai to tend to her daughter. “I apologize for the delay and thank you for your assistance, Lady Mei.”

“You could hardly be blamed for this,” Chōjūrō replied with the polite diplomacy that was expected of him. “The poor thing. She certainly won’t be able to attend the dinner this evening.”

“No, and that’s a shame.” Shikamaru agreed. “There aren’t many members of Lord Sixth’s generation left in Konoha to congratulate him on his retirement. Perhaps Temari wouldn’t mind sitting with Mirai this evening so Kurenai may still go.”

“No, Shikamaru,” Kurenai came out of her daughter’s bedroom and joined the others in the hallway. “I wouldn’t ask your wife to give up a chance to visit with her brother.”

“I’ll stay with Mirai.” Mei spoke the words automatically, and before she was fully conscious of what she was offering, out of a deeply-rooted need to resolve any troubled situation.

“Lady Mei, I couldn’t possibly—” Kurenai began, but Mei interrupted her.

“You would be doing me a favor, truly. I’m tired from traveling today, and I would prefer a quiet evening.” She turned to Chōjūrō and chuckled at his surprised expression. “You are the Mizukage now, and my presence isn’t necessary at dinner.”

“Speaking of which, we should get going Lord Mizukage. We still have to go to your guestroom first,” Shikamaru latched onto the opportunity to get the planned evening back on track. “Lady Mei, I’ll return with Kurenai later and escort you to your room then.”

After a bow, the two men departed. Kurenai turned her piercing eyes to Mei again, “It’s kind of you to offer, but I won’t hold you to it unless you insist.”

“I do. It’s more important for the Rokudaime and the Nanadaime to be surrounded by their friends and family, rather than a retired Mizukage from a foreign land.”

Kurenai paused, looking intently at Mei. “You’d be more welcome than you think you are, Lady Mei.” She pressed her quietly.

“Please, I’d prefer it this way,” Mei assured her with a smile.

Kurenai nodded her assent and led Mei to her lounge. After putting together a simple meal and seeing to any other detail for Mei’s comfort, Kurenai left for the evening’s planned dinner.

After Mei ate, she chose a book for herself from Kurenai’s collection. She turned on a lamp to compensate for the waning daylight and settled herself in a chair for the evening; satisfied that at least she no longer had to worry about whether Kakashi Hatake would speak to her, or not.


	3. Chapter Two

A large crowd had gathered in the square below the Hokage Tower, and it was still growing. Surrounded by such a swarm of people, Mei noticed the glaring absence of one person in particular.

It was the most important day of his life, yet Naruto Uzumaki was nowhere to be found.

Mei scanned the rooftop of the Hokage tower for the Nanadaime’s sun-kissed hair; her gaze often landing and lingering on the Rokudaime. Even at this distance, even though he wore his mask, Mei could see how Kakashi’s irritation gave way to agitation.

“I would never have imagined that Naruto would run late to his own inauguration,” Chōjūrō spoke his and Mei’s thoughts aloud. “Perhaps he celebrated too much last night,” he chuckled.

The corner of Mei’s mouth twitched in a slight grin, but it vanished before it could grow when two of their most unlikely allies turned to join their conversation; uninvited.

“He’s got some nerve keeping Lord Kakashi waiting up there!” Karin bristled.

“Sasuke isn’t here either,” Suigetsu mumbled, just loudly enough to be heard over the general murmur of the crowd.

“I’m not surprised by that.” Chōjūrō folded his arms across his chest as he regarded Suigetsu. “He goes out of his way to make himself feel unwelcome.”

“You’re right about that,” Suigetsu laughed. “This ‘journey of redemption,’ or whatever he calls it is dramatic even for him.”

“Oh, who cares about _Sasuke_?” Karin sneered his name.

“Well, you, for far too long.” Suigetsu jabbed in reply.

“That was before I met the man that taught him. Sasuke is nothing compared to Lord Kakashi.”

Suigetsu’s jaw dropped, and then he sputtered, “You had only met the man last night!”

Karin spit back at him, “You’re wrong, Suigetsu! Lord Kakashi and I met years ago.”

This caught Mei by surprise, but all three of the others were too focused on the argument to notice her momentary lapse in composure.

“What? When? How?” Suigetsu drilled Karin.

Karin’s glasses fogged as she brought her hands up to cover her cheeks. She had blushed almost the same shade as her crimson hair. “When he saved me from Sasuke,” she swooned. “He picked me up as if I weighed nothing, and then carried me _so_ gently all the way back to the Hidden Leaf.”

One sharp tooth poked out of Suigetsu’s disapproving frown. “And straight to Konoha’s prison.”

“That’s beside the point, Suigetsu!” Karin screeched.

The crowd around them began to cheer, interrupting the argument before Suigetsu could test Karin’s hot temper any further. Mei turned her attention to the rooftop of the Hokage Tower once more.

Naruto Uzumaki stood at the edge of the tower, uncharacteristically stiff and waving to the crowd below him. “Thank you! Thank you,” he shouted down to them.

Mei wondered how the international hero could have arrived wholly unnoticed by the multitude that had eagerly awaited him. “Did he just pop out of thin air? He doesn’t sound quite like himself, either.”

“I’m sure I wouldn’t sound like myself if I’d drunk as much as he did last night.” Chōjūrō smiled up at his new fellow Kage.

“Why couldn’t Lord Kakashi have had a cloak like the Nanadaime’s instead of that awful robe?” Karin’s whine could be heard over the roar of the crowd. “He has such strong, broad shoulders and you’d never know it when he wears that potato sack.”

“Naruto has really done it.” Kurenai’s gentle voice came from close behind Mei; contrasting Karin’s brash tone.

Mei turned around just in time to see Kurenai blink a tear from each of her striking eyes. “Forgive me, Lady Mei, I’m just so proud of him. This has been a long road for Naruto, and no matter what happened to him, he never gave up on his dream.”

“He was already an extraordinary young man when I met him. It’s difficult for me to imagine him as anything other than a celebrated hero.” Mei smiled at Kurenai.

“I’ve known him since he was a little boy, and I can assure you that wasn’t the case. He struggled with more than any child should. His wife, Hinata, is one of the few that stood by him through it all. She was my pupil, and I’m so proud of her too.” Kurenai wiped her cheeks with the back of one of her hands.

Her other hand grasped Mirai’s hand as the little girl peeked up at the new Hokage from behind her mother’s skirt.

Kurenai turned her attention to Mei again. “Did you teach genin in Kirigakure, Lady Mei?”

“No. No, I never had that pleasure.” Mei smiled softly at Kurenai. “It’s an experience that I wish I’d had, but I became Mizukage before I had the chance to, and I didn’t have time to teach afterward.”

“Well, that’s understandable. Impressive too, I hadn’t realized you were so young when you were chosen to be Mizukage.” Kurenai’s serene countenance had returned in time for her curiosity to be sparked. “There’s still time, you know, to do the things you feel that you’ve missed out on.”

“So everyone keeps telling me,” Mei let out a soft laugh.

“Lady Mei is about to do one of those things that she missed out on, aren’t you?” Chōjūrō had turned his back to the still-quarreling Karin and Suigetsu in favor of joining the conversation between Mei and Kurenai.

“Oh?” Kurenai puzzled.

“I’ve always wanted to visit the Fire Temple, and as long as I’m already in Fire Country, I decided I would finally go.”

“My late husband, Asuma, spent part of his youth there. I’ve meant to go as well since his passing, but I thought that Mirai was too young. However,” Kurenai glanced down at her daughter, “perhaps she’s not too young anymore.”

“If I knew Lady Mei was to have a traveling companion, it would certainly make it easier for me to leave her behind. Speaking of which,” Chōjūrō turned to Mei. “I’m going to say my formal goodbyes now so that I can catch the next train back to Kiri. The longer I’m away from the council, the more paperwork appears on my desk.” His shoulders slumped a little.

“You’re right about that,” Mei giggled. “I’ll be fine either way, Lord Chōjūrō. Travel safely.”

Chōjūrō smiled and nodded at Mei, then crouched to address Mirai. “I’m glad you’re looking so well today,” he said to her. “Try not to fall from high places, if you can.” Then he ruffled her hair, stood and bowed his departure from the two women.

“If you’re not otherwise engaged, you’re welcome to come to my home this evening, Lady Mei. I owe you a proper thank you for staying with Mirai yesterday, and we could talk more about going to the Fire Temple.”

Mirai punctuated her mother’s invitation when she added, “Please come.”

“How could I refuse?” Mei smiled warmly at Mirai, and then Kurenai in turn. She hadn’t made formal plans, had intended to keep to her guest quarters and a low profile until she would leave Konoha to make her way to the Fire Temple. Another quiet evening in Kurenai’s company was something to look forward to.

“Kakashi didn’t seem to enjoy himself at dinner yesterday evening. He’s never cared for stuffy, formal affairs, so I’m having a small dinner to celebrate his retirement this evening. Would you join us for that too?”

Mei felt her throat catch at the invitation. She didn’t want to insult Kurenai or disappoint Mirai, but the familiar anxiety at the possibility of seeing Kakashi washed over her. Before she could reach a decision, an eavesdropper made it for her.

“Of course, we’d love to come!” Karin exclaimed from behind Mei.


	4. Chapter Three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize for the delay in updating this story, and I thank you for your patience. XOXO

Mei ignored her self-consciousness as she checked her reflection in the mirror one last time before leaving her room.

The hallway of the guest wing in the Hokage Tower was bustling with departing dignitaries. Visitors from the Land of Water had the longest travel time, owing to the international railway’s continued construction. However, the other representatives came from the mainland and had the option of taking night trains back to their respective nations.

“Where is your suitcase, Lady Mei?”

Mei turned on her heel at the gruff voice of the Yondaime Raikage to come face-to-face with the man himself. She took a step back from his bulk and his abrupt question before answering, “I’m not leaving yet.”

“You’re not? Why would you stay?”

He had an air about him that made it impossible to leave his questions unanswered, no matter how unnerving they might be. “Lord Rai—”

“Ei. Call me Ei.”

“Lord Ei,” Mei compromised. “I have plans to visit elsewhere in the Land of Fire.”

Ei stared at her without replying.

Mei felt compelled to elaborate under the weight of his gaze, “Now that I’m retired, I have the time and opportunity to explore the other nations.”

“For what reason?” Ei continued to drill her and Mei was becoming irritated by it, though she wouldn’t show it.

“Curiosity, Lord Ei. I mean to enjoy this era of peace after working so hard for it.”

“I see,” Ei seemed satisfied with her answer, to Mei’s relief. “I hope that the Land of Lightning is among your travel destinations. I would accompany you during your visit there.”

Ei bowed to her and departed before Mei could think of anything to say in reply.

The Godaime Raikage trailed close behind his predecessor and addressed her as he bowed his departure as well. “Sorry, retired life is dull for him. You’re welcome to visit the Hidden Cloud, Lady Mei, whenever you’d like.”

Mei bowed slightly, still too stunned to speak. She waited until the representatives of Kumogakure were out of sight before she also left the Hokage Tower.

The unexpected invitation occupied Mei’s thoughts as she walked to Kurenai’s home. She’d meant it when she said she wanted to enjoy the era of peace between the nations and she did hope to travel to them all. Perhaps growing up in a nation that had intentionally closed itself off caused her surprise at being so welcomed. She decided that, even though the international alliance had been sought, it would still take time for her to adjust and relax into it.

Lost in her thoughts, Mei had arrived at Kurenai’s home before she knew it, but it wasn’t the hostess that threw the door open when she knocked.

Karin’s enthusiasm visibly dissolved when she saw who it was. “Oh, good evening Lady Mei.”

“Karin! This isn’t your house, y’know,” Suigetsu picked up where the bickering pair had left off the last time Mei had seen them.

Kurenai emerged from her kitchen, “I’m glad you’ve arrived, Lady Mei.”

Mei noted how settled Suigetsu and Karin seemed to be already. “I’m not late, am I?”

“No, some of the guests arrived early,” Kurenai replied, with a sidelong glance at the argumentative duo.

Which only fueled them. “See, Karin? I told you we should’ve waited.”

“Punctuality is a virtue, Suigetsu! There’s nothing ruder than making everyone else wait on you.”

“Would you like some help?” Mei addressed Kurenai, ignoring the others.

“Everything is ready to be served; I’m just keeping it warm because I can always count on Kakashi to be late—”

“See, Karin?” Suigetsu interrupted Kurenai. “Even the Rokudaime runs late!”

“You can’t expect a man of Lord Kakashi’s position to arrive on time, Suigetsu!”

“Perhaps there is something you could help me with,” Kurenai resumed her conversation with Mei.

“Please,” Mei replied and joined her hostess in the kitchen.

“Tea?” Kurenai inquired once she and Mei were safely in her kitchen.

“Thank you, yes.”

Kurenai presented a full cup to Mei before pouring one for herself. “I have a confession to make,” she said as she leaned against her counter and blew on her hot tea.

Mei tilted her head in reply to encourage Kurenai to continue.

“I’ve wanted to make your acquaintance for a long time. I’ve heard you spoken of so highly and I think, in my eagerness for your friendship, I invited myself and my daughter along on your trip to the Fire Temple without thinking of how that might disrupt your plans. I’m sorry if it was rude.”

“Not at all!” Mei exclaimed. “You and Mirai are welcome company, and,” Mei looked down at her tea. “I’m happy to have the time to invest in friendship now. That hasn’t always been the case.”

When Mei looked up, Kurenai was smiling at her, and she returned it before continuing, “I’m glad that you two will be coming with me, truly.”

Their conversation halted when a knock at the front door was heard. Both women had entered the lounge by the time Karin had opened the door to the new arrivals.

“Lord Kakashi! How good of you to come,” Karin made to step through the door to greet him, then backed out of the way to allow space for Kakashi to push Gai and his chair through the door.

Mei’s throat caught at the mention of his name. She took a step back, gripping her teacup and doing her best to blend into the background.

Mirai came bounding out and straight to Gai, “What challenge should we do tonight?”

“Mirai,” Kurenai’s quiet scolding was barely heard over Gai’s enthusiastic laughter. “Wait until after we’ve all eaten, or at least until I’ve introduced our other guests.”

She took a step further into the room. “These two came for Naruto’s inauguration and have stayed to join us this evening. Suigetsu,” Kurenai gestured to the pair that had finally ceased bickering, “and Karin whom you’ve already met, Kakashi.”

“Ah—” Kakashi began, a little confused before Karin cut him off.

“You carried me to Konoha after I was injured,” she sighed.

“After Sasuke left her for dead.” Suigetsu corrected.

“Ah,” Kakashi repeated, with recognition in his voice this time.

Kurenai then turned and gestured toward Mei, who remained at the far edge of the room. “And this is—”

“The Lady Godaime Mizukage,” Kakashi finished.

Mei looked up to meet his eyes. Both of his grey eyes, so unlike the mismatched ones she’d once known, held a momentary surprise before he just as quickly recovered from it.

“That’s a mouthful,” Gai laughed, drawing Mei’s attention to him.

“I call her Lady Mei,” Kurenai offered.

“Lady Mei…Terumī?” Gai asked her.

“Yes,” Mei nodded.

Gai stole a quick glance at Kakashi as he made to close the door behind them.

“Shall I help you set the table?” Karin suddenly remembered the manners of a considerate guest once she’d acquired her desired audience for it.

“We’re still waiting on Genma and Ebisu,” Kurenai replied.

“Who are coming up your path now,” Kakashi said as he held the door open to the last of Kurenai’s dinner guests.

Mei looked out the window to see the two jōnin waving at Kakashi and quickening their steps to the house.

Kurenai began to push Gai’s chair to her dining room with Suigetsu, Karin, and Mirai in her wake. “We must be really late if we're arriving _after_ you,” Genma laughed at Kakashi as he closed the door behind himself and Ebisu.

“Better late than never,” came Kakashi’s baritone voice in reply.

Mei turned herself to face the window completely, hiding her wince at those words from everyone, though only one could know how they’d affect her.

She listened to everyone’s voices trail off as they followed the others into Kurenai’s dining room, collecting herself before she’d join them. Out of the corner of her eye, she thought she saw Kakashi linger in the doorway, but when she turned her head, he was gone.


	5. Chapter Four

“So that was Konohamaru up there? No wonder Naruto didn’t seem like himself,” Genma chuckled. He leaned back in his chair, pulled his senbon from behind his ear, and used it as a toothpick.

“Poor Naruto,” Kurenai said as she stood up and began to collect the dirty dishes from the guests at her dining table.

“I’ll help you,” Mei offered quietly. She took Gai’s plate from her left and Suigetsu’s from her right before stacking her own on top. Then she rose from her chair to accept plates from the other guests. Karin had settled herself next to Kakashi during dinner, and she retrieved his plate from him, setting it atop hers before handing them both to Mei when she came around.

Mei carried the plates to Kurenai’s kitchen, her mind leaping to unfortunate suppositions based on what she’d observed during dinner. She’d never seen Kakashi so relaxed and social before. At first, she assumed it was because he was surrounded by his oldest friends. However, as the meal went on, it was Karin that occupied him the most.

Granted, she had done her obvious best to monopolize his attention. While Kakashi hadn’t matched her enthusiasm, he hadn’t discouraged Karin either. He had been engaged in conversation with her, most of which was out of Mei’s earshot, throughout dinner.

Watching them made Mei ache, then burn, before a quiet sort of sadness had settled, dousing her jealousy.

“Oh, thank you. Just leave them in the sink for now,” Kurenai instructed Mei when she arrived in the kitchen, pulling her out of her thoughts.

Both women returned to the lounge and the other guests. Suigetsu stood against the wall, while Ebisu and Genma had seated themselves. Gai and Mirai entertained everyone as they discussed which ambitious challenge they would attempt that evening.

“I’m sorry to spoil the fun, but I don’t think Mirai should do any challenges so soon after her accident yesterday,” Kurenai’s velvet voice rang gentle but firm.

Mirai was outraged and began to protest, but Mei’s attention was drawn away from the girl when Kakashi entered the lounge, with Karin hanging on his arm. “What accident?” He asked.

“Mirai was showing Shikamaru how she could walk up a streetlight and then she fell and dislocated her collarbone. Lady Mei stayed here with her so I could attend last night's dinner with everyone.”

Kakashi’s eyes darted to Mei’s, but then he quickly looked away. He escorted Karin to a chair and then seated himself in another.

“Your mother is right, Mirai. It’s important for you to heal first,” Gai attempted to reason with and placate the child.

Suigetsu pushed himself away from the wall and walked to Kurenai’s kitchen. “Let me wash the dishes; it’s the least I could do after we crashed your party.” He looked over his shoulder and called out to Mirai, “C’mon Squirt, you can tell me where the plates and things go.”

“I’m not a squirt; I’m a kunoichi!” She yelled as she chased after him.

Kurenai appeared surprised but didn’t try to stop him. She sat down and began a conversation with her guests. “I still feel terrible for Naruto.” Then she gestured to Mei, adding, “I’ll meet with Hinata and try to plan something special for him after we get back from the Fire Temple.”

“When are you going to the Fire Temple?” Gai asked.

“I’d invited myself and Mirai along on Lady Mei’s planned trip, and we were going to discuss the details tonight. When had you planned to go, Lady Mei?” Kurenai turned her attention to her friend.

“Well, tomorrow originally, but if that’s too soon for you, I don’t mind waiting if Konoha doesn’t mind having me a little longer.”

“I think I can speak for everyone when I say that you are very welcome here,” Kurenai smiled at her. “Tomorrow is fine if you don’t mind leaving late in the morning.”

“I don’t mind that at all,” Mei smiled at her friend. “I’ve happily fallen into the habit of forgetting to set the alarm since I’ve retired,” she laughed softly.

“I hadn’t thought of the Fire Temple as a tourist attraction, but I suppose it _is_ a unique feature of the Land of Fire,” Genma piped up, his senbon clicking against his teeth as he spoke.

“I remember you said you wanted to visit the temple,” Kakashi added, quietly.

Mei drew in a quick breath, nodding her head and then looked down at her hands in her lap. She wasn’t sure how to respond to his reference to a private conversation that had been held at least two decades ago, and even if she did, she was too surprised to attempt it. Fortunately, she didn’t have to.

“That’s an excellent idea,” Gai beamed at the two women, brightening the entire room. “Kakashi, we should join them.”

Mei looked up, glancing at Gai and then Kurenai, who looked back at her with a warm smile as well. “Is there room for two more?” She asked.

“I don’t see why not,” Mei returned the smile to them both. It was the first time in a long time that the idea of being in Kakashi’s company _didn’t_ cause her immediate anxiety.

Kakashi hummed thoughtfully, approving the plan.

“I’m jealous,” Ebisu chuckled. “Maybe we should think about retiring early if it means we can take a vacation on a whim.” He elbowed Genma who joined him in his laughter.

“I should go too, I’m always stuck in that stupid lab,” Karin whined, reminding everyone of her presence. “Now that I finally have an excuse to be out, I’m not in a hurry to go back.”

The room fell quiet. It seemed that no one wanted to be so impolite as to refuse Karin, but none welcomed her either.

“I can imagine that must be difficult for you,” Kakashi gently broke the uncomfortable silence.

“It is-it really is. I can’t tell you how awful it can be down there,” Karin continued her complaint. Then she pushed her glasses up on her nose, and her countenance changed entirely. “Where are we meeting tomorrow?”

Kurenai turned to Mei, wearing both a red flush and her struggle to do her best to keep her composure on her face. “You’re staying in the Hokage Tower, correct?”

Mei nodded; the only reply she could muster.

“That’s as good a landmark as any,” Kurenai continued, sounding less flustered than she looked. “We’ll meet in front of it tomorrow.”

“Well, you can count me out.” Suigetsu joined the conversation unexpectedly, making Mei wonder how long he’d been listening in. “C’mon Karin. I’m ready to go back to our inn.”

“Stop telling me what to do, Suigetsu! Do whatever you want; I’m staying.”

“I don’t want you to walk back by yourself.” Suigetsu quietly replied, breaking from their previous pattern of constant arguing.

“I’m sure Lord Kakashi wouldn’t mind walking me back,” Karin smirked and blushed.

It was a moment before Kakashi quietly stammered, “O-of course.”

Suigetsu stared at Karin with a disapproving frown. Then he bowed to Kurenai. “Thank you for dinner,” he said and turned to leave.

“Wait, Suigetsu. I’ll walk with you,” Mei said and then turned to Kurenai. “Now that we’ve decided on tomorrow’s trip, I’d like to turn in too, so I’m rested and ready.” In truth, Mei wanted to leave before her disappointment became obvious or her jealousy could get the better of her.

Kurenai smiled at her, apologetically. Mei stood up and squeezed Kurenai’s hand to reassure her. “Thank you for dinner, and I’m looking forward to tomorrow.” Then she bowed to the room, issuing a polite goodbye to the lot of them.

Mei had enjoyed the company of most at the evening’s dinner, but it had been difficult for her to relax. Kakashi’s voice never changed in all the time she’d known him. His mind too; however, his behavior that evening confused her. She was prepared for his indifference, but not his attentions to another. His cold politeness to her, his acceptance of Karin’s advances, and then the referral to an old, intimate conversation…

Mei’s mind was reeling from his conduct, and she was glad to walk away from it as she left with Suigetsu.


	6. Chapter Five

_He lifted her in his arms, leaping to a broad branch high above them. Mei leaned back against the trunk of the tree, breathless at his offer._

_His hands ran up the sides of her body outside of her jōnin uniform, following her curves that she’d allowed him to know beneath it. She tilted her head back and closed her eyes, giving herself over entirely to her lover’s touch. Mei felt his fingers from one hand tangle into her hair, pulling strands loose from the bun in which she’d bound them. His other hand joined his first after tugging his mask down._

_Kakashi tilted her head to his, kissing her deeply and slowly, wordlessly expounding upon his promise. The tip of his nose pressed further and further into her cheek with the force of his kiss, and it lasted until he’d exhausted all the breath he held in his lungs._

_Kakashi tore his lips from hers and pressed their foreheads together. His breath caressed Mei’s face in gentle puffs as he whispered to her, “Lord Third is willing to offer you asylum. You wouldn’t have to fight anymore, Mei! I’ll take you to the Fire Temple. I’ll take you _anywhere_ you want to go. Please, come back with me.”_

“…come back with me.”

Mei awoke to the sound of her voice repeating Kakashi’s words from the past, remembered and relived while she’d slept. She kept her eyes shut and her body still, chasing after the dream as it faded.

Her mind and body woke too quickly for her to catch and hold it again, so Mei blinked her eyes open. The unfamiliar surroundings of her guest room gradually came into focus. The second night had been easier to sleep within it, despite her troubled thoughts. Thankful for a good night’s rest, she sat up and began to unwind her braided hair.

Mei threw the covers off of her legs and stood up from the bed. She raised her arms out and up, twisted to either side at the waist, and rolled her shoulders to stretch herself fully awake. She drew in a long, deep breath as she lowered her arms again, clearing the cobwebs of the past from her thoughts.

Mei had waited a long time for this day, and she wasn’t about to let anything or _anyone_ tarnish her visit to the Fire Temple. She exhaled, pleased with and smiling to herself.

She gathered the length of her hair, wound it several times before piling it on top of her head and secured it there as she strode to the washroom in her guest quarters to clean up for the day. She’d washed and dried her face and was vigorously brushing her teeth before she stopped to check her reflection. She stared at herself in disbelief, toothpaste running down her chin.

Mei had absentmindedly stumbled into a good hair day.

She spit, rinsed, and wiped the foam from her face before looking up again to confirm. She smiled at her reflection and the freckles that she rarely exposed. She would definitely wear her hair up today, she decided.

Mei walked to the closet to choose the clothes she’d packed especially for this visit. Once she’d zipped herself into a pair of comfortable trousers and buttoned a loose, linen blouse, she checked the clock on the nightstand of her guestroom.

Not having to struggle with her hair afforded her plenty of time for a proper breakfast. Mei grabbed the necessary items she required for the day and went out in search of one.

A little over an hour later, Mei approached the Hokage Tower to meet with her traveling companions. All but one had arrived, and the group stood with their backs to her, expecting her to exit the tower when she came to meet them. As she neared, she overheard Kurenai’s raised voice.

“…Well, what did you expect? I couldn’t believe you indulged her like that, Kakashi! What were you thinking?”

Mei slowed her steps in an effort to avoid joining the group of old friends at an awkward moment. If Kakashi replied to Kurenai’s scolding, Mei didn’t hear it.

“Lady Mei!” Mirai had been twirling around a nearby flagpole and caught sight of Mei while the others continued to look in the opposite direction. They turned around to face her, surprised.

Kurenai walked toward her, smiling genuinely. “You look so different with your hair up! It suits you.”

The sun reflected off of Maito Gai’s teeth, blinding Mei as she smiled a greeting to him in return. Kakashi stood silent, his mask hiding most of his face and all of his reaction, though his eyes remained on her.

“Good morning,” Mei said to the group, her excitement and eagerness to get to their destination returning to her.

Kurenai produced a train schedule and hummed thoughtfully as she looked it over. “The next train leaves in thirty minutes.” She raised her head and spoke over her shoulder to Kakashi, “Are you _sure_ Karin hasn’t changed her mind about coming today?”

“Positive,” he replied, stuffing his hands in his pockets.

“It should only take twenty minutes for us to get to the station, get our tickets, and board, so we can wait a few more minutes,” Kurenai said as she stowed the schedule away. “However, if she’s not here soon, the two of you can take another train and meet us there.”

Kakashi shifted his weight from one foot to another and nodded as he looked down.

Another five minutes passed before Kurenai took position behind Gai’s chair to push him to the train station. Before she could call to Mirai, Karin cried out to the group as she came running to them.

“I’m sorry, Lord Kakashi!” She screeched and came to a sudden stop. She planted her hands on her knees, bent double, catching her breath.

“Stupid Suigetsu,” Karin ground out between pants, “he left without waking me this morning! At least he paid for the room,” she grumbled. “Anyway,” she stood upright and pushed her glasses higher up the bridge of her nose, “ready?”

Kurenai reached a hand out to her daughter, beckoning her over. Karin reached to loop an arm around Kakashi’s at the same time that he reached forward to grasp the handles of Gai’s chair to push him. Unaffected, she seemed content to keep pace beside him.

Mei caught her mind starting to drift to unpleasant thoughts, so she turned her back to the pair, determined to keep her spirits up. She felt Mirai’s little hand reach up to clasp hers, and she looked down at the girl.

“This is the first time I’ve left the Hidden Leaf Village!” She beamed up at Mei; every inch of her face shone pride and anticipation.

It was enough to rekindle Mei’s excitement, too, as she squeezed Mirai’s hand. From behind them, Gai issued an impassioned proclamation about youth, and Kurenai let her head fall back in laughter as the group departed for the train station.


	7. Chapter Six

When traveling by train, Mei kept her eyes focused on objects that were further in the distance. It created the appearance that the train was moving slower than it was, though when they passed a copse or signpost nearer to the tracks, the deception would be temporarily broken. She was carried past whole sections of forest without time to scrutinize or admire them, and if she blinked she’d miss them entirely. The experience brought a better understanding of the elders’ trepidation of the international railway.

_“The past always fears the future. It’s easy to remain in the familiar, but the world is changing, and it is time that Kiri accept and embrace change, too.”_

That had been Mei’s argument, and it was enough to carry her will to fruition. She had fought hard, determined to prevent the return to policies that had isolated the Land of Water. She had been keen to convince others quickly, so that progress could quickly come to her home.

“I don’t do well on boats so I was afraid the trains would make me feel sick, too. I’m glad they don’t,” Gai’s voice broke through Mei’s thoughts.

She sat back in her seat so her shoulder wouldn’t obscure his view out the window. “It’s amazing how fast they go, isn’t it?” Gai asked, turning his gaze to Mei.

“I was just thinking that,” Mei smiled.

“I wonder how many kids challenge themselves to outrun a train. I’m sure that at least one of my students would have,” Gai chuckled. “I know _I_ would have. I wonder if I could’ve.”

Mei was well acquainted with Gai’s injury and the cause of it. Her knowledge of medical ninjutsu was limited, and she respected her good friend’s prowess. Tsunade had spoken of her frustration at not being able to cure him and hadn’t given up on the possibility that she still could. These days, she spent more time researching options and studying new treatments than gambling.

Mei thought it best to keep that to herself, though. Instead, she offered, “I believe you could’ve outrun a train.” Gai smiled sheepishly in response, so she continued earnestly, “You proved yourself stronger than five Kage put together. I wish I had seen you kick that arrogant look right off of Madara’s face.”

“Me too,” Kurenai joined their conversation, smiling at her old friend from where she and Mirai sat across from him. “I bet you made quite an impression on Madara Uchiha,” she beamed.

Gai laughed, “He wasn’t the one I wanted to impress. My eternal rival was there, and if he hadn’t taken me seriously before, he has since.”

Kakashi sat in the next row with his back to Kurenai and Mirai. Karin sat beside him, and though she continued to talk, he turned his head to glance over his shoulder at the others and nodded.

“Lee was also there, and would’ve opened all eight gates if I hadn’t,” Gai went on. “That’s something I’d never want to see,” he folded his hands in his lap.

“Who is Mad-ra Uchiha?” Mirai asked.

“Someone you will learn about and never have to worry about beyond a written exam at the academy, thank goodness,” Kurenai explained.

“And that’s worth all of the joint pain of the summer of my youth a hundred times over,” Gai rallied his spirits with a blinding grin at the girl.

“I agree,” Mei laughed. “Although Kiri has many hot springs and they help to soothe those pains. I hope you’ll visit them; it’ll be my pleasure to make you feel as welcome in my home as you’ve made me in yours.”

“Is the Land of Water famous for its hot springs?” Kurenai asked.

“I suppose time and tourists will determine that for us, though it seems that would be the most attractive feature we could offer, initially. Inns are being built or renovated around hot springs at the same pace as the train tracks. Everyone is getting ready for Kiri to open its doors to the rest of the world,” Mei gestured animatedly, her serene countenance always gave way when she spoke of her home.

“Did the Hidden Mist Village sustain that much damage during the fourth war that it’s still undergoing construction?” Gai asked.

“No, not during the fourth war,” Mei answered. “But there have been generations of unrest in my nation. It would be fair to say that Kirigakure had been at war since its inception; most often with itself.”

“Until you put an end to it,” Kurenai smiled, and her eyes shone as she praised her friend.

Mei clasped her hands and looked down at them. She wasn’t falsely modest, but compliments tended to make her feel embarrassed; a trait she wished wasn’t so deeply ingrained within her. However, in this instance, she knew she didn’t deserve all of the credit and was quick to amend Kurenai’s statement.

“I’m proud of my part in the changes occurring in Kirigakure, but none of it would have been possible without the international alliance.”

“… And the international alliance wouldn’t have been possible without you, Lady Mei,” Gai added.

Mei continued to look down at her hands but chose to accept his compliment instead of arguing it.

Kurenai seemed to sense her embarrassment and gently changed the subject. “We’re almost there,” she said as she glanced out the window. “I meant to ask you this last night, Lady Mei; why do you want to see the Fire Temple?”

Mei looked out the window in time to catch a glimpse of two monks walking on the road as the train sped past them. She smiled at their clean-shaven heads and the robes that they wore.

“I knew a small order of monks in Kirigakure. They spoke so often and so highly of this place; I’ve wanted to visit since I was a little girl. I can’t believe it has taken me this long.” Mei settled back in her seat to look at Kurenai and noticed Kakashi shifting in his seat over her friend’s shoulder. The idea that he could overhear her made her feel suddenly self-conscious.

“Do they have a monastery in the Land of Water as well?” Kurenai’s question brought Mei’s attention back to her.

“No, unfortunately. They had a modest compound though, in a remote location on an island far from the Hidden Mist Village. They considered themselves a separate entity within the shinobi world, much like your monks do here.”

“My late husband was a member of the Twelve Guardian Ninja, who served directly under our Daimyō as opposed to the Hokage, but I don’t know much about them beyond that. He rarely spoke of that time in his life.”

Mei considered her words before speaking. “In the past, Kirigakure had a rigid society. The First Mizukage was known as a wise and cautious man, and it was he that established the closed-door policies of our nation. He was a formidable man, even the Feudal Lords feared him. He structured our society and corralled our people into specific classes. I don’t know what his intentions were, but his actions laid the foundation for the unrest in Kiri. The monks didn’t fit neatly into the First Mizukage’s social order and were therefore shunned by many; much like those that carried kekkei genkais. They remained in the Land of Water because of the few that needed them.

“In addition to civil uprisings, the Kaguya clan plagued us, attacking villages at their discretion. Whenever the monks heard of another attack, they would send some of their order to seek out and bring back any survivors. Wherever the Kaguya clan descended, orphans could be found after they left. That was how I came to know their compound.”

Gai patted Mei’s hand, and Kurenai’s eyes revealed understanding. The more Mei saw of the world, the more she realized how members of their generation had similar experiences regardless of location or allegiance.

“Did they teach you the shinobi arts?” Gai asked.

“To a point, yes. My father had begun to teach me, especially as it pertains to the lava and acid releases. Because there were so many different children of different ages and abilities living there, the monks focused on taijutsu.” Mei paused a moment when Gai’s eyes sparkled.

“But when Kirigakure decided to enter the third shinobi war, they raided the compound for soldiers. From then on, whatever I didn’t learn from the ninja of the Mist, I learned through experience,” Mei finished.

“What became of the monks?” Concern crept into Kurenai’s question.

Mei looked out the window as the train had slowed noticeably and was nearing the station. “I hope that some of them managed to make their way to the Fire Temple.”

Soon after, the train jerked to a stop and the passengers prepared to disembark. Kakashi was the first of the group to get up and retrieved Gai’s chair for him. He unfolded it and held it steady, and then his eyes slowly traveled up to Mei’s.

Mei held his gaze for a moment while Gai eased himself into his chair. It felt like a silent conversation had passed, but because of his mask, she couldn’t guess at what the topic had been. Then he turned away, pushing Gai down the aisle in front of him.


	8. Chapter Seven

The train had brought the group closer to the Fire Temple, but there was still a fair distance to travel on foot.

The Temple itself was nestled among the mountains that bordered it on the west, north, and east. To the south lay a large field and the only path for guests of the temple to travel on. Mei and her companions had followed this path as it led them north.

Though there was plenty of conversation around her, Mei was too immersed in the natural surroundings to participate in it. She’d infiltrated the Land of Fire on a handful of occasions as an agent of Kiri’s ANBU, but those excursions never took place before nightfall, never went far from the border, and never allowed the opportunity to admire the landscape.

Mei felt it was the first instance in which she was genuinely happy for the leisure time that retirement afforded her. Her eyes feasted on the view from the mountains that dominated the horizon, to the trees that dotted them in the distance, to the tall grasses beside her. It sparked a sense of adventure so different from her experiences as a shinobi; exciting, but not at all dangerous.

Until her admiration of the grand view stole her attention from her immediate surroundings. She strayed from the path, lost her balance on the uneven ground and fell, twisting her ankle in the flora she thought so lovely the moment before.

“Lady Mei!”

Mei heard Kurenai shout her name as she felt herself turned over and pulled to sit up. Startled, she looked up to find Kurenai rushing towards her as Kakashi returned to his position behind Gai’s chair.

Kurenai tugged at the tall grass, freeing Mei’s ankle. “Does it hurt badly?” she asked.

“No, I’ve only twisted it.” In truth, the pain was nothing compared to the embarrassment Mei felt over suffering a civilian’s injury.

Kurenai helped her to stand. “I’m not sure you should put your weight on it,” she cautioned.

The commotion behind Kurenai caught Mei’s attention. Kakashi had taken Gai’s backpack from him and secured it to his front. Gai then launched himself out of his chair and into a handstand.

“I’m sure it’s fine, I just need to walk it off,” Mei downplayed the injury beneath Mirai’s cheers and elation over Gai’s vigorous display of his youthfulness.

Karin stepped back when Kakashi swiveled the chair and pushed it closer to Mei, who began to protest when she realized his plan. “No, that’s not necessary. Really, I’m fine I—”

Kakashi pulled her arm over his shoulders, cutting her argument short. He wordlessly assisted her into the chair then resumed his position behind it. “Thank you, Lord Sixth,” Mei muttered.

The early afternoon sun reflected in Karin’s glasses, hiding her eyes. She pinched her lips tightly together, her mouth forming a thin line, displaying her displeasure. She folded her arms across her chest, spun on her heel, and turned her back to them.

Gai, to Mirai’s delight, resumed following their path to the temple as it veered east, walking on his hands. Karin followed them and Kurenai chuckled at her daughter’s laughter before she began fretting over her friend again.

“Are you dizzy from the train ride? Or perhaps you’ve had too much sun?” she worried as she kept pace alongside Mei when Kakashi began pushing the chair forward to keep up with the others.

“No, that’s not it,” Mei laughed sheepishly. “I was blinded by the beauty of the Land of Fire.”

Kurenai tilted her head in curiosity as the corner of her mouth turned up in a small smile.

“I’m used to vast expanses of water and waves, not land and fields, trees and mountains.” Mei gestured with her arms as she explained.

Kurenai hummed in understanding, nodding her head. “Is it much different than you imagined?” she asked.

“I _couldn’t_ have imagined this,” Mei stretched an arm out to the mountains in the distance. “I mean, I’ve seen photographs, but it’s nothing like being here, among them. It’s not only the mountains, but your forests are also so dense, and the trees within them must be eons old.” She trailed off, losing herself in the landscape again.

“Some of the larger islands of the Land of Water sport forested areas though, correct?” Kurenai inquired.

“Yes, but none of the trees ever reach an advanced age. Every few years, we have strong storms with high winds, and the trees take the brunt of it. Even on the larger islands, the soil is sandy, so the trees are easily uprooted. I’ve visited several sites after such storms to assess the damage, and the trees look like so many broken matchsticks afterward. Those that survived the storm are usually so bent that we have to cut them down because of the danger they pose to our citizens. However,” Mei turned to face Kurenai, “the trees produce many seeds and repopulate quickly. They’re tall and skinny and aromatic; it’s as if they know they won’t live long.”

“I have heard of gardens being a prominent feature of Kirigakure as well,” Kurenai appeared to share Mei’s curiosity about foreign nations.

“I think that must be referring to the hanging gardens, which adorn the rooftops in urban areas like the Hidden Mist Village. Most of the native plants and flowers of Kiri are sparse and stubborn,” Mei laughed. “They’d have to be, with so much wind, rain, salt, and sand. However, the hanging gardens are closely monitored and tended to, so exotic flowering beauties thrive within them. They do make for a spectacular skyline,” she added with a smile to her friend.

“This is the skyline throughout most of the Land of Fire.”

Kakashi’s baritone came softly from behind Mei, reminding her of how near he was; that it was he that pushed her as they breached the forest at the base of the mountains that made up the eastern border of the Fire Temple.

“It’s magnificent,” she replied, barely above a whisper.

The new surroundings ushered in a change of atmosphere. The canopy of branches and leaves sheltered the travelers from the midday sun, cooling and refreshing them. It wasn’t long before Mei inhaled the scent of dewy moss, wet bark, damp earth, and all of the fragrances of the forest. Thick-trunked trees stood everywhere, muffling the noise of the world beyond them. The only sound that could be heard was the whispered secrets of the wind as it gently rustled through the leaves above them. The group fell quiet, reverent, as they proceeded along the path.

When they met the mountainside, they found the first of a series of narrow stairs carved into it. The travelers took a moment to rest before they’d begin the final ascent to the Fire Temple.

Gai sat on the ground and Kakashi walked over to him, handing him a canister of water. Karin joined them immediately, and Kurenai tended to her daughter, leaving Mei alone in the chair. She rotated her ankle experimentally and found the pain had subsided. She checked to confirm that there was no swelling before she began to ease herself up and out of the chair.

“Lady Fifth,” Kakashi was suddenly at her side, near enough to address her in a hushed voice.

Mei met his eyes, expecting him to continue. She remained silent at his apparent hesitation.

He briefly looked away before asking, “Ah, will you be able to take the stairs?”

“Yes,” Mei answered, nodding her head.

They stood in expectant silence, and confusion began to creep into Mei’s mind again. Before it could dominate her thoughts, however, she offered a polite smile and turned to join Kurenai and Mirai.

“Wait,” Kakashi spoke again in the same hushed voice. Mei turned to regard him again and waited for him to continue.

“The temple that stands there now is not the same one you’ve heard described by the monks you knew in Kiri.”

Mei felt her eyebrows knit together before she asked, “What do you mean?”

Kakashi sighed, his expression solemn. “The Akatsuki attacked the Fire Temple prior to the fourth war and annihilated it. It pains me to tell you this, but I think I must.”

Mei clenched her jaw. Her survival of the war-torn shinobi world meant that she knew what his next words would be. She knew, and still, she feared them as she did every time she expected to hear them said aloud.

“There were few survivors,” Kakashi finished.

“I see,” Mei’s automatic reply came out dignified and hollow as she nodded her head. She swallowed, hard as the faces of those she’d hoped to see again swirled in her mind. “Thank you for warning me,” her eyes darted between Kakashi’s, and she willed that they carried her earnest gratitude to him before she turned to join Kurenai and Mirai.


	9. Chapter Eight

“We’re almost there!”

Mirai’s enthusiastic shout reinvigorated Mei and her traveling companions as they continued to climb the seemingly endless narrow stairs up the side of the mountain to the Fire Temple.

Mirai proved the most qualified to lead the charge, having the smallest legs and an endless stream of encouragement to urge her comrades along. Her mother, Kurenai, was experienced with her daughter’s excitement and kept up admirably. Kakashi carried Gai on his back, though it had taken significant convincing to prevent the latter from ascending the stairs on his hands or disregarding the stairs altogether in favor of climbing the mountain itself. Mei and Karin brought up the rear of the small parade as it continued up, up, up.

Without Kakashi to ingratiate herself to, or Suigetsu to argue with, Karin kept to herself, taking the stairs silently beside Mei. The younger woman was obviously sulking; the less attention Kakashi paid to her, the more she pouted. Mei wasn’t eager to test Karin’s temper by trying to distract her with conversation about their shared outing, and she had a feeling that Karin wouldn’t appreciate her efforts at trying to cheer her up. As it was, she was doing her best to keep her own spirits high, to keep disappointment and sorrow out of her mind and heart.

Mei always knew that there was the possibility that she wouldn’t encounter familiar faces from her past, but hope sprang eternal in her heart that she still might. She could appreciate that it had been difficult for Kakashi to tell her about the Akatsuki’s attack on the Fire Temple. He showed consideration and kindness in telling her, and she was thankful that he did. The last leg of their journey allowed her time to prepare herself for the confirmation of more loved ones lost.

“I can see the gates! And the guardians!”

Mirai’s exhilaration carried on the wind and brought a smile to Mei’s lips. She looked up to find a final, much wider set of stairs. Mirai was halfway up them, beaming proudly at the others below her.

“Let me down, Rival.”

Gai had issued a demand, not a request, and Kakashi respected it. He bent forward until he could touch his toes, so Gai could slide down and land in a handstand. He took off, almost running on his hands to meet Mirai at the halfway point. Kakashi stood upright, stretching his shoulders and back, chuckling at his friend.

Karin was at his side immediately. “Lord Kakashi, you’re so strong,” she simpered.

Mei rolled her eyes, then chastised herself for it, and hurried to catch up with the others.

“What _are_ they?” Mei arrived in time to hear Mirai’s question as she pointed at the statues on either side of the gates.

“That is a Karasu Tengu, and a Yamabushi,” Kurenai answered.

Mirai looked up at her mother, her next question written plainly across her face. Kurenai’s experience as a sensei had prepared her well to meet her daughter’s questions with answers, and she began to explain.

“The Tengu are a type of yōkai that resemble birds. Do you see their wings? Do you see the one on the left has a very long nose like a beak?” Mirai nodded in reply, listening attentively. Kurenai continued, “They seem like fearsome creatures, and they _are_ dangerous, but also protective. They are the spirits of forests and mountains. According to legend, it was the Tengu that brought ninjutsu to the world of man. Sometimes, Karasu Tengu are called Konoha Tengu.” Mirai looked up at her mother; her eyes sparkled when she heard her home associated with the supernatural creatures.

Kurenai smiled as she went on, “The Yamabushi are like disciples of the Tengu. They are holy men that live alone, in the mountains. They dedicate their lives to learning the wisdom of those yōkai. They are known for their asceticism and their feats of endurance. They follow the path of training and testing. They believe that discipline is the key to spiritual power.”

“So, the Fire Temple monks are like the Yamabushi?” Mirai asked.

“I suppose they could be, yes,” Kurenai answered.

“Do they have special powers?”

“Yes,” Gai joined in the lesson. “These monks are the only shinobi that know how to use a special kind of chakra called, ‘The Gift of the Sages.’”

The fact that he was upside-down when he said it didn’t make it any less impressive. Mirai’s eyes were as wide as teacups, and her mouth hung open. She quickly clamped it shut, however, when the mammoth iron doors that sealed the Temple opened with an earth-shattering clang.

A single figure strode through them to address the Temple’s visitors. He wore simple white garb with a dark grey robe that was draped over his left shoulder and wound around his lower torso. He recognized one member of the group after a quick inspection. “Lord Sixth, we weren’t expecting you, but you are always welcome,” the monk bowed.

Mei stared at the monk as he came nearer to them. Though the serious, bald man wasn’t familiar, his dark eyes and the scar that ran down the side of his head, were.

Kakashi greeted the monk in return. “Thank you for admitting us; this isn’t a formal visit. I’m sure that you remember Gai, and this is Karin,” he introduced the two that were nearest to him first. Then he gestured to the others as he continued, “This is Kurenai Sarutobi and her daughter Mirai.” The monk’s eyes lingered on the pair at the mention of their family name. Then they drifted to the final member of the group as Kakashi resumed, “And this is Lady—”

“Mei?” The monk interrupted Kakashi, astonished.

“Sentoki!” Mei exclaimed. “I thought it was you, but I wasn’t sure. You were much shorter and had a lot more hair the last time I saw you.”

“And you had a lot less,” Sentoki laughed with her.

The rest of the group looked on, smiling at the reunion.

“We were hoping you would come,” Sentoki clasped his hands together in front of him.

“We? You mean others made it here safely as well?” Mei couldn’t help the emotion that crept into her voice.

“There aren’t as many now, but, Zenza is still here. He’ll be so happy to see you, too.”

“Zenza! Oh, thank goodness. He was such a gentle, quiet child. I was afraid that he was enlisted—” she cut herself off. “I’m glad to know that he’s here.”

Mei smiled at Sentoki; memories flooded her mind too quickly and too thoroughly for her to continue speaking. It gave Mirai the opportunity she was waiting for. “Do you have the Gift of the Sages?” she asked, tugging on Sentoki’s outer robe to gain his full attention.

Kurenai snatched her daughter’s hand away with a whispered scolding. The monk, however, laughed heartily. “One thing at a time. First, let’s go inside,” he said as he turned around and led the group to the top of the stairs and up to the gates. “Welcome to the Fire Temple,” he extended an arm, inviting them through the doors.

Mei thought she’d never been happier. Only minutes earlier, she was bracing herself to find none of her childhood friends here. She turned to look behind her and saw Kakashi releasing Gai’s chair from the scroll he’d sealed it in.

He unfolded it and held it steady as Gai seated himself within it. Mei could feel her eyes shining, could feel her cheeks stretching around her broad smile. When Kakashi saw it, his mask shifted, and creases formed in the corners of his eyes; betraying his hidden smile, revealing his genuine happiness for her in return.


	10. Chapter Nine

Mei experienced all of the serenity she’d hoped to find at the Fire Temple. The group had arrived after the monks’ final meal of the day and the blessing that preceded it. The inhabitants of the monastery were quietly busy with their tasks of tending to the temple itself as well as the grounds surrounding it.

At this elevation, the wind gained a voice, low and implacable as it sang through the mountains. It was joined by a chorus of bells that varied in pitch and volume. Deer chasers scattered throughout the grounds kept a syncopated rhythm, lulling any troubled thoughts into genuine peace of mind.

The group had split up, each pursuing their own interests in the Fire Temple. Sentoki showed Mei around the grounds until they came upon Zenza as he was weeding one of the gardens. His eyes widened and brightened when he recognized her, and he rushed over to join them.

“Mei! Or I _should_ say Lady Mizukage,” he bowed to her.

“That title doesn’t belong to me any longer, and even if it did, I would still prefer that you call me Mei,” she smiled as he stood upright again. “How are you, Zenza? I can’t tell you how happy I am to see you again; to see you both again,” she reached a hand out to each of her childhood friends.

The three sat together reminiscing for so long that another monk brought tea out to them. Though Mei’s surprise visit was enough to excuse them from their duties, Sentoki explained why they ought to return to their tasks. “We’re expecting two monks from Iwa to arrive before nightfall. Luckily, you came on a day when we were already preparing to present the temple at its best,” he smiled apologetically.

“We passed two monks during our train ride here,” Mei remembered. “They weren’t far behind us. I’m surprised they didn’t take the train themselves if they’re coming from such a distance.”

“It doesn’t suit our way of life,” Sentoki chuckled, “though we will take it when speed is required to relate something of importance to our international brothers.”

“I hadn’t thought of it, but I suppose the alliance allows you to maintain relations with monks of other nations,” Mei mused. “The tracks are nearly finished in the Land of Water, and Kiri will be opening its doors soon,” she added excitedly.

“Perhaps one day, we’ll return to visit,” Zenza smiled gently, and Sentoki nodded absentmindedly, his attention drawn behind Mei.

Zenza continued, “For now, however, we are needed here to reestablish our order and bring the Fire Temple back to its former glory. Ah, Lord Sixth, welcome,” Zenza bowed to Kakashi, who had just joined the three.

“The Akatsuki attack on this place must have been dreadful if you’re still rebuilding the monastery and your numbers,” Mei stated what she thought was the obvious owing to her surprise at Kakashi’s joining them, apparently alone.

“It wasn’t only the attack; the Infinite Tsukuyomi caused many monks everywhere to question their choice of lifestyle. Some found that they couldn’t return to it,” Sentoki’s dark eyes darkened further.

“Under the Rokudaime, Konoha was generous with funding, resources, and volunteers to help us rebuild the temple. Of those that came to help, some have stayed,” Zenza focused on the positive. “And our brothers from other nations have come to our aid as well.”

“Speaking of, we should get back to our duties before our brothers arrive. It’ll be sunset before we know it,” Sentoki assessed the sun’s position in the sky as he spoke. He returned his gaze to Kakashi and then Mei, “Your group ought to consider spending the night here; it’ll soon be too dangerous to descend the mountain.”

“I don’t think anyone would object to that; thank you for accommodating us.” Kakashi bowed as he spoke.

“I’ll send word to have rooms prepared for you all, they won’t be luxurious,” Sentoki chuckled again, “but you will be comfortable.”

“Please join us for the evening meditation as well,” Zenza invited them as the monks bowed their departure, leaving Mei and Kakashi alone.

Though she was surrounded by the most tranquil atmosphere she’d ever found herself in, it wasn’t enough to completely calm Mei’s nerves when she found herself alone with Kakashi for the first time in years. It didn’t help that he remained standing while she remained sitting in a silence that was heavy and growing more uncomfortable by the moment.

Finally, he broke it. “I’m sorry if my intrusion ended your reunion with your friends.”

“You didn’t,” Mei was quick to assure him, and then pushed herself one step further. “It doesn’t mean that you’re unwelcome.”

Kakashi stood for another moment before he awkwardly joined her on the bench on which she sat.

His posture was stiff, and he cleared his throat, “I, uh, want to apologize to you for last evening. I said something out of anger, and I’m embarrassed by my behavior toward you.”

Mei didn’t have to think hard to know what he was talking about. His remark, _‘Better late than never,’_ had stung her, and she’d spent part of the evening trying and failing to convince herself he hadn’t said it intentionally. She was humiliated all over again to have it confirmed that he had.

However, it was short-lived when he continued, “I misunderstood the reason for your absence from the formal dinner; I didn’t know about Mirai’s accident and that you had stayed behind with her so Kurenai could go.”

“Oh,” Mei’s reply was simple in contrast to how her mind continued to overthink his effective jab at her, but his apology went a long way to ease it. “Please don’t let it trouble you,” she added.

Neither met the other’s eyes as he nodded silently, though his shoulders visibly relaxed.

Mei drew in a quick breath, hoping that something, anything could come to mind to continue their conversation, but Kakashi beat her to it. “I’m surprised to learn the Infinite Tsukuyomi dreams thinned the numbers of the monks, though I suppose I shouldn’t be.”

“Perhaps it’s because you didn’t have one,” Mei offered.

Kakashi hummed as he considered her response. He kept his eyes focused on the temple grounds in front of him. “What was your dream?” he asked quietly.

Mei held her breath while she quickly decided which and how much of the truth she was willing to confess. “It was more of a trick than a dream,” she began.

“It was a hollow fantasy that preyed upon a regret of mine,” Mei looked down at her hands as they clasped each other tightly in her lap. “It wasn’t the substitute reality that Madara and Obito said it would be. It was unfulfilling, incomplete,” she sighed.

“Kakashi! There you are.”

Mei and Kakashi turned to look over their shoulders at Gai’s booming voice to find the rest of their group waiting for them with the addition of two monks. “Our hosts would like to show us to the rooms they’ve prepared for us,” he gave the reason for their interruption.

Kurenai smiled warmly at the pair, while Karin stood beside her with her hair bristling, and eyes flashing with her mounting, fearsome temper.

Mei stood up from the bench and made to join the others but stopped when Kakashi addressed her.

“Lady Fifth,” he said as he met her eyes. “Thank you for accepting my apology. I would hate it if we were enemies.”

Mei swallowed and searched his eyes intently. “I can promise you that we never will be, Lord Sixth.”


	11. Chapter Ten

Even if it wasn’t a frequent occurrence, the monks of the Fire Temple were well-prepared to put up unexpected guests for the night. Three rooms had been made ready for the travelers; Gai and Kakashi in one, Kurenai and Mirai in another, which left Mei and Karin to share the third.

Mei walked into the room and looked around her. The neutral walls were bare, tatami mats covered the floor, and two futons were folded in two corners of the room with bedding and simple toiletries stacked atop each. She could hear the wind outside the walls and single window, though no drafts were allowed in. It was a sparse and spotless room so like the one she’d spent some of her childhood within.

Mei crossed the room to claim the futon in the far corner there. She knelt and ran her fingers over the toothbrush and the small bar of soap that rested upon a white cotton washcloth and matching hand towel. Beneath them was a yukata provided to her to sleep in. She fingered the soft cloth of it thoughtfully. The sound, the setting, sent her mind traveling to the past.

Mei drew both hands in her lap as she reminisced. The room of her childhood had also contained a dresser with four drawers, which, like that room, she had shared with another girl her age. Two drawers were ample for all the belongings Mei could claim upon her arrival. She had knelt in front of her futon then, as she was now, and pulled out her two most precious possessions from her knapsack to display alongside her roommate’s treasures on top of the dresser: her mother’s hair comb and her father’s forehead protector.

“What is he to you?” Karin’s question yanked Mei’s thoughts to the present.

Mei hummed in confusion, prompting Karin to roll her eyes.

“Lord Kakashi. What is he to you?” Karin pushed her glasses up higher on the bridge of her nose.

“He’s an ally, a fellow Kage,” Mei offered, hesitatingly.

The sunset streamed in through their window, catching in the lenses of Karin’s glasses, obscuring her eyes behind them. “That’s not what I meant,” she said, unable to mask her irritation.

Mei felt her temper rise quickly, inexplicably. “Just because you’ve developed a keen interest in Lord Sixth’s affairs, it does not entitle you to know mine.”

Karin huffed before turning her back to her. Mei was surprised by her own sharp response, but could neither regret it nor would she apologize for it. She stood up and exited the room, closing the door behind her.

Mei leaned against the wall, alone in the hallway. She closed her eyes and attempted to cool her temper. She could no longer deny that she was jealous. Jealous of Karin’s deepening affection for Kakashi, of Kakashi’s attentions to Karin the previous evening, but most of all, Mei was jealous of Karin’s chance at happiness with him. What at first seemed as such an unlikely match became more and more possible in Mei’s eyes.

It was apparent that Karin viewed her as a rival, and Mei couldn’t understand why she didn’t assure the younger woman that she wasn’t.

Her eyes flew open when the door to the room next to hers opened. Kurenai poked her head out in the hallway and smiled softly when she saw Mei. “We could squeeze you in here if you’d prefer,” she offered.

Mei tried to conceal her troubles beneath a weak laugh, but Kurenai’s sharp eyes saw through it. She stepped fully into the hallway, softly closing the door to her room.

“What is it?” Kurenai placed a reassuring hand on Mei’s arm.

Mei sighed and searched Kurenai’s eyes. She found warmth and genuine concern within them, urging her to unburden. Mei looked down before she began to speak, “I—”

“Ah, here you are. Do you have everything you need to spend the night?” Sentoki stood in an open doorway that led to a large common room at the end of the hallway.

Mei met Kurenai’s eyes and issued a brief, small smile to her friend. “Yes, thank you, Sentoki,” she said, turning her attention to the monk.

“Good. We’ve prepared supper for you all, which, like your rooms,” Sentoki smiled to them, “is simple but adequate. It’s ready to be served, and your companions are already seated in here,” he stepped out of the doorway and gestured for the women to enter.

The door to Mei’s room was pulled open, and Karin strode straight to the common room without a word to either of the other women in the hall. Kurenai glared after her for a moment, an angry flush creeping into her cheeks. She turned to regard Mei again and gently squeezed her arm before withdrawing her hand to call Mirai to supper.

When the final three travelers arrived in the common room, dinner had been set out, and Karin had already wedged herself to sit between Kakashi and Gai. Mei chose to sit at Gai’s other side, hoping the enthusiastic Leaf ninja would obscure her view of the other pair.

He proved himself capable of the task without knowing it had been assigned to him, engaging her in conversation shortly after the group had thanked the monks that attended them. “Maybe it’s the cold mountain air, but the idea of touring hot springs seems even better now than when you first mentioned it, Lady Mei. If it weren’t for the ferries, I’d pack my bag as soon as we return to Konoha.”

“If that’s your only objection, I’m sure that Lady Tsunade would have a remedy for you,” Mei replied.

“I’m sure she would too, Gai. I have every intention of taking Lady Mei up on her invitation,” Kurenai joined their conversation. “When would you suggest we plan such a trip?”

“Sooner rather than later, in another couple of months, the weather may make travel not only difficult but dangerous.” Mei set aside her utensils and gave her full attention to Gai and Kurenai. “If you’d like to visit next month, that would give me plenty of time to put together an itinerary, place reservations, and so on, if you’d trust me to make all of the arrangements.” From across the table, Mirai’s eyes shone at the prospect of another adventure outside of the Leaf Village, and Mei’s smile broadened.

“Well, you’ve sold me on it,” Gai laughed before turning his head to address Kakashi. “What do you say, Rival? Will you join—“

Gai was interrupted by Kurenai, who suddenly stretched across Mei’s place setting to grab Gai by the arm. “Let’s ask him after we return,” she said in a firm, but hushed voice.

Mei was grateful that Kurenai’s quick thinking prevented another opportunity for Karin to invite herself on their next planned trip. Gai appeared confused but didn’t attempt to get Kakashi’s attention again.

Mei kept her eyes lowered, forcing her attention anywhere but on Kakashi and Karin as she finished her meal. She was soon caught up in Gai and Kurenai’s excitement again as they discussed when they would come to Kirigakure, and for how long they could stay.

They had finished their meals before a quiet knock at the door was heard. Zenza stood in the doorway, smiled at Mei, then bowed in greeting to the others. “Evening meditation will begin soon, so I’ve come to see if any of you would care to join us.”

“Is that how you get the Gift of the Sages?” Mirai asked.

“That’s part of it,” Zenza chuckled. “Although, there’s a great deal more that one must do to earn such an extraordinary gift.”

“Do you have it?” Mirai’s eyes widened; she barely contained her eagerness to learn more of the technique.

Zenza smiled softly and nodded.

“What is it?” Mirai asked, barely above a whisper.

Zenza neared the young girl and bent over to meet her eye-to-eye. “A secret,” he whispered and smiled again.

Though she was denied the answer, Mirai couldn’t help but giggle. “I’ll learn it someday,” she promised.

“Perhaps, you will. Does that mean you’ll join us?”

“Can I?” Mirai asked her mother.

“Yes, and so will I,” Kurenai answered.

“And I,” Mei stood up from the table.

“Well, Kakashi? Should we see who can meditate the longest?” Gai smirked as he issued the challenge. “_Without_ falling asleep,” he added as he pushed himself away from the table.

Kakashi closed his eyes, creases forming in the corners betraying his amusement and nodded his agreement. After he stood up, Karin trailed after him as the bells summoned all who could hear them to the main hall, where they would sit in quiet reflection.


	12. Chapter Eleven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I struggled with a scene in this chapter for so long. I knew that there was a simple solution that eluded me and I want to thank [Wickedbee](https://archiveofourown.org/users/WickedBee/pseuds/WickedBee) and [kakashiharuno](https://kakashiharuno.tumblr.com/) for helping me to find it during a brainstorming session. XOXO

Mei emerged from the evening meditation with a calm, clear mind.

Quieting her thoughts had helped to organize them and put her emotions in perspective. As angry as she was at herself for feeling jealous, she realized it was no good to punish herself further for it. She accepted it and determined that the entire day had contributed to her emotions running high.

The fears of learning that she’d lost more childhood companions, the delight of being reunited with some of them, and the tension that came from being in close proximity to Kakashi was more than enough for anyone to be getting on with for one day. There was also the confusion that arose from his apology, and inquiry into her Infinite Tsukuyomi dream. Mei wondered at his curiosity about something so private, so personal.

This allowed her to forgive herself for her quick temper and jealousy before dinner. Mei also convinced herself that putting some distance between her and Kakashi was a better plan than trying to become closer to him again.

She could only assume that he was conflicted and wasn’t sure how to behave around her. Mei thought this only made things difficult for him to pursue another, and as painful as that would be for her, she would never deny him that opportunity. However, she didn’t have to bear witness to his possible attachment to Karin, either.

Mei woke the next morning with remnants of her calm clarity still intact. It strengthened when she sat up and found herself alone in the room she shared with Karin. She dressed quickly, folded her futon and bedding into the corner, and made sure she had everything she’d brought with her so she wouldn’t have to return to the room again.

After washing her face and brushing her teeth with the toiletries provided to her, she made her way to Kurenai and Mirai’s room. “It’s Mei,” she said after quietly knocking at their door.

She entered after hearing Kurenai’s invitation through the door. They were already dressed and in the process of packing themselves up as well. “Good morning,” Mei greeted them. “The sky looks clear enough for our return trip to Konoha.”

“Yes, and I don’t think we should push our luck,” Kurenai laughed. “I’m eager to get us back home as I’m sure you’re eager to return to yours.”

“I confess that I am,” Mei replied with a soft smile. “I have your visit to look forward to as well, and I’m happy to be tasked with planning it out.”

Mei waited in their room while Kurenai took her daughter, and the two washed up for the day. Once all three were ready, they ventured to the common room where they’d had dinner the evening before.

“Good morning!” Gai greeted them with more energy than anyone ought to be allowed to have at such an early hour.

Mei couldn’t help but smile at him; his enthusiasm was contagious, and it further endeared him to her. “Good morning to you. I hope we haven’t kept you waiting long,” she replied as she sat beside him at the table in the room.

Kakashi met her eyes briefly, tilting his head toward her in greeting. Karin silently sat at his side.

“Our hosts are about to bring us breakfast, so you’ve arrived right on time,” Gai said as Kurenai and Mirai took their seats at the table as well.

“Are we all set to head out after we’ve eaten?” Kurenai asked the group.

“I’d like to say goodbye to Sentoki and Zenza before we go, I could skip breakfast so I don’t delay our departure,” Mei offered.

“There’s no need for that,” Sentoki spoke as he entered the common room with Zenza in tow. “We’ve come to join you for breakfast,” he smiled, and the two monks took seats across the table from her.

Breakfast arrived soon after, and while Mei and her friends were responsible for the bulk of the conversation during the meal, it was peppered with questions from Mirai about the Gift of the Sages. Afterward, Sentoki and Zenza escorted the group to the massive gates of the Temple.

“Are you allowed to maintain correspondence with me? I would hate to lose touch with you again,” Mei did her best to fight off the sadness that was inevitable when parting with her childhood friends.

“We are, and we will,” Sentoki assured her.

Mei smiled warmly at each. “I’m minded to speak to Lord Chōjūrō about allowing a temple or monastery to be built in the Land of Water.”

“I can speak for all of our brothers in the Land of Fire and beyond when I say that we would happily welcome and support such an endeavor.” Sentoki’s voice proved how earnest he was.

“It would be a fitting way to honor the legacy of those brothers that risked and endured so much for all of our sakes,” Zenza’s reply came quieter than Sentoki’s, but it was just as heartfelt.

Mei gave a solemn nod, wishing she had established such a temple during her time as Mizukage. She looked up again at the two monks and thought it best to finish her goodbyes quickly. “Look for a letter from me soon and please reply as swiftly as you can,” she smiled. “You can’t know how happy I am to have seen you again. Take care, both of you.” Then she bowed to them and left the Fire Temple.

The rest of the group was waiting at the top of the long set of stairs that were carved into the mountainside. Mei joined them in time to hear Gai arguing his ability to descend on his own.

“I won’t need your help to get back down, Rival,” Gai said firmly, proving that he wasn’t willing to debate it. He thrust himself from his chair and sat on the first step. He then lowered himself to the next step, and then the next, without placing any weight on his permanently injured leg. The pace he established challenged Mirai’s, so Kakashi folded his chair and sealed it in a scroll without argument.

Mei and Kurenai followed Gai’s lead and began their descent. Kakashi trailed behind them, and all three turned when Karin spoke up, “Would you carry _me_ then, Lord Kakashi?”

The morning sun shone brightly behind Karin from their angle below her, blinding them. Kakashi raised a hand to shield his eyes from the glare. “Are you injured?” he asked.

“No, but I barely slept last night, and I’m exhausted from yesterday’s travel,” Karin moaned. “I’m worried that I would fall, though I’m sure you’d catch me if I did, Lord Kakashi,” she smirked.

“I’d rather avoid the falling part in the first place,” Kakashi retorted. “Very well, get on,” he said as he turned his back to her so that she could climb onto him.

Karin happily tugged the pack she was carrying off of her back, twisting herself on the narrow step in her excitement, and lost her balance. With his back turned, Kakashi didn’t see it happen and wasn’t prepared for it. Kurenai and Mei reached for her, but the bright glare of the sun obscured their vision. Karin fell out of their grasp and down an entire set of stairs carved into the rock. She landed with an appalling thud and audible crack.

To everyone’s horror, she laid there, unmoving.


	13. Chapter Twelve

Mei rushed down to where Karin lay at the bottom of the stairs. Kurenai followed her, and Gai gathered Mirai in his arms, pulling her to him to shield her view. When the two women arrived, they found Karin alive, but unconscious, and bleeding from the back of her head.

Mei looked up to where Kakashi stood motionless, staring down at them in shock. “Give me your vest,” Mei shouted to him, “and alert Sentoki of this, see if they have a stretcher for us to use to carry her back.”

“O-of course,” Kakashi came out of his stupor, shrugging his vest off and throwing it down the stairs.

Kurenai caught it and bunched it up before handing it to Mei to press against Karin’s head wound. “The bleeding isn’t too bad; hopefully this looks worse than it is,”

“Yes,” Mei agreed as she applied pressure to the back of Karin’s head.

Kakashi and Sentoki returned with a stretcher, and they gingerly moved Karin onto it while Mei continued to hold the vest to her head. They carried her back up to the Fire Temple, slowly.

When Karin was settled in a bed, Mei checked the status of her wound. The bleeding had lessened, and it was more indicative of a bad scrape rather than a more serious head injury. Sentoki returned with an ice pack and towels which Mei placed beneath Karin’s head. Kakashi returned with Gai on his back and with Kurenai and Mirai in tow.

Together, Mei and Kurenai checked Karin over for any broken bones, and during their inspection, Karin regained consciousness. After checking her eyes and asking a few questions, it was obvious the fall had left her concussed. The two women ensured that Karin was comfortable, and then joined the others that waited just outside the room to relay this news and discuss their options.

“She shouldn’t travel for a couple of days, or at least until the severity of her concussion can be determined,” Mei gave her assessment.

“I agree,” Kurenai concurred. “The monks said that they had a telephone, we could call the Konoha hospital and have them dispatch medics here.”

“Orochimaru’s lab is much closer. I don’t think it would please Karin, and I don’t like the idea, but I could get there quickly and alert them instead. We’d have to report the incident to them anyway,” Kakashi’s voice carried his reluctance when he spoke. “Orochimaru may have experimented on her, and if he’s altered her genetically, then he may be the best option to treat her,” he rubbed his chin with one hand as he voiced his thoughts aloud.

He sucked in a breath and let his hand fall before looking directly at Mei. “Do you think this is a good plan?” He asked her.

“I do,” Mei agreed, surprised that it was her opinion that he valued, given his present company.

Kakashi nodded and made to leave immediately, but stopped and turned around. “You should still return to Konoha, and I’ll update you on her condition when I get back.”

“I’ll wait here and return to the Leaf with you, Kakashi,” Gai replied in a much more subdued manner than which he normally spoke.

Kakashi nodded at Gai and then met Mei’s eyes again. “Will you travel back with Kurenai and Mirai?” he asked her.

“Yes, and I would appreciate it if someone would send word to me on Karin’s condition when I get home,” Mei replied.

“You’re leaving so soon?” Kakashi asked.

Mei was taken aback by his question and stammered when she answered it. “I-I had no plans to stay in Konoha beyond my visit to the Fire Temple. I’ve no business in the Hidden Leaf, so I must return to Kiri.”

“I see,” Kakashi replied and glanced quickly at the others. “Travel safely,” he said, and then he departed.

Sentoki returned shortly thereafter with antiseptic and bandages. Mei and Kurenai returned to Karin’s room with the supplies and checked her over again, addressing any minor injuries they came across.

When they returned to the others, Gai had related their plan to Sentoki, who assured them that the Temple would tend to Karin for as long as necessary. Mei and Kurenai bade their farewells and began the trek back to Konoha with Mirai.

The return journey was a somber one, each traveler being so caught up in their concern for Karin. It was only after they’d reached the forest at the base of the mountain they’d descended when Mirai finally broke the silence. “Do you think she’ll be okay, Mama?”

The use of the endearing moniker conveyed Mirai’s fear and sadness, and it affected Mei as well as Kurenai. “She’s being well looked after, just like you were when you fell, and you’re all better now,” Kurenai artfully reassured her daughter with the most truth she could give.

Mei made an effort to at least appear more cheerful after that for the rest of their trip to Konoha, if only for Mirai’s sake. She encouraged the girl to ask her questions about the hot springs of Kirigakure, and owing to Mirai’s age and disposition; her curiosity was endless. The last few hours of traveling were filled much more happily, even though Karin was never far from their thoughts.

The trio arrived in Konoha by late afternoon. Kurenai and Mirai convinced Mei that no trip to Konoha was complete without a meal at Ichiraku, and so they rewarded themselves with a large bowl of ramen at the end. Mei gave her telephone number to Kurenai and secured the promise that she would call soon and often, whether it was to talk about Karin, or about their plans to visit Kiri, or just to chat. After saying goodbye to her new friend and her daughter, Mei went to her guest room in the Hokage Tower.

Once alone and without distraction, the jumbled thoughts of Mei’s mind fought for her attention. She was exhausted from it, and though most of the trip to Fire Country had been enjoyed, she was eager to return home.

Mei debated taking the night train as far as she could on the mainland versus going to sleep and catching the first train out in the morning as she approached her room in the quiet Hokage Tower’s guest wing. When she opened the door to her room, she found a lamp turned on within, and a good friend sitting in a chair near the window.

“I hear you’ve had quite an adventure,” Tsunade greeted her with a smirk.

“Indeed,” Mei smiled warmly at the welcome sight of her friend.

“Karin should be fine and able to travel in a couple of days,” Tsunade reassured her.

“The Temple called already? I thought Lord Sixth had decided to go to Orochimaru for help?” Mei was surprised at the altered plan.

“He did, but the monks thought to call anyway, just in case. Suigetsu arrived there as we were ending the call. Kakashi must be out of shape if that brat outran him,” Tsunade chuckled.

Although she was relieved to hear the good news about Karin, Mei’s smile faltered at the mention of Kakashi.

“What’s wrong?” Tsunade asked, in a gentle tone that showed her concern.

Mei shook her head slightly. “I wouldn’t know where to begin to tell you.”

“In that case, why don’t you skip the train, and we travel to the coast the old fashioned way? That would give you plenty of time to figure it out,” Tsunade smiled mischievously. “You don’t really have to rush back to Kiri, do you? When was the last time you camped under the night sky with a bottle of sake and a warm fire?” 

“Since I can’t remember when,” Mei smiled, agreeing to Tsunade’s plan.


	14. Chapter Thirteen

“Now then,” Tsunade spoke as she settled herself opposite of Mei. “I find that the best place to begin is the beginning,” she smirked.

A loud popping sound burst from the campfire between them, shooting sparks upward in the complete darkness that surrounded them. A mixture of gentle curiosity and quiet acceptance shone on Tsunade’s face, illuminated by the firelight.

Mei was tired of her private struggle. She was ready to unburden.

“I’ve always wondered how you two met. It’s not often that you hear of two accomplished ANBU agents from enemy nations meeting face-to-face, and both living to tell of it. Nevermind forming an attachment,” Tsunade’s voice was muffled at the end of her statement as she brought a cup of sake to her lips.

“He was my target.”

Mei’s voice sounded small and timid, even to her. It was appropriate for such a confession to admit to have been tasked with the assassination of Kakashi Hatake. Mei looked at Tsunade for her reaction, unsure, and little afraid of continuing.

“It’s one of the many sins of the past. I’m not surprised that you were ordered to, and I’m very glad that you didn’t,” Tsunade smiled encouragement for Mei to go on.

Mei managed a weak half-smile in return. “On paper, I was to act as a messenger that accepted peace treaty negotiations from the new Fourth Hokage. The unwritten command was to obtain his sharingan and dispose of him.”

“Like Ao and the byakugan,” Tsunade nodded in understanding.

“Yes, exactly,” Mei replied. “It goes without saying that I wasn’t successful.”

“Kakashi has always been a formidable shinobi. I can imagine he’d be a challenging opponent for you, and you for him,” Tsunade thought aloud.

“It never got that far,” Mei spoke barely above a whisper. “They filled my head with hate for him. They told me that he had brutally slaughtered an entire unit of my comrades, like some rabid animal,” her voice came stronger as her anger mounted, then diminished again when she added, “They didn’t tell me the whole truth, however.”

“So, what happened?” Tsunade was too caught up in the story to remember the cup of sake she held.

“He bowed to me in greeting, and I was rude to him,” Mei’s gaze drifted, and a smile played on her lips as she slipped into the memory of that first meeting.

_“It’s customary to bow in return, y’know,” the hound mask muffled his cracking, adolescent voice, but not his irritation._

_Mei stood stiff and silent, waiting for him to come near enough to be caught in a cloud of acid that he couldn’t escape from, giving her just enough time to rip the sharingan out of him before he melted away._

_“Tch,” he shifted his stance, “we’re not at war anymore—”_

_“I will _never_ bow to the Konoha Dog that killed my comrades,” Mei interrupted him._

_Though his mask continued to smile, the mismatched eyes behind it narrowed in cold fury. “Your comrades destroyed mine when they sealed the Three-Tails in her.”_

_Mei’s eyes, hidden behind her own ceramic mask, widened in shock._

_“I didn’t kill them; she__ stopped me. Rin died because of it, and… and I have no idea what happened, or why _I_ was left alive,” he reached into his hip pouch and pulled a scroll from it. “For all I know, the beast went on a rampage after its host was killed.” Then he threw the scroll he was assigned to deliver, and disappeared behind a smokescreen._

“So you delivered the message, but failed your mission,” Tsunade reached for her bottle of sake and refilled her cup. “I bet that didn’t go over well with your commanding officer.”

“No, it didn’t, and then I made it worse,” Mei sighed. “I asked if it was true that Kiri Nin had sealed _our_ tailed beast within an outsider. I couldn’t believe it, Tsunade. I didn’t want to,” Mei refilled her own cup.

“What happened?”

“I was dismissed from ANBU, which was as good as confirming his story,” Mei drained her cup in one swig. “I was surprised when they assigned me to another messenger mission. They said that, since I’d already met with him once that he would know my identity, and by sending me other Kiri shinobi could remain unknown to a foreign nation.”

“I bet he wasn’t happy to see you again,” Tsunade laughed.

“I’m sure he wasn’t,” Mei laughed as well. “But, I bowed to him first that time.”

_“You’re wearing a different uniform,” he said as Mei straightened again._

_“And you’re not,” she replied. “How can you be sure that I’m the same person?” She teased, hoping he understood her attempt at an apology for her rudeness at their previous meeting._

_He shifted his weight uncomfortably from one foot to the other. “Your hair,” his voice was less harsh as he spoke, “I’ve never seen anyone else with your color hair.”_

_Mei blushed, embarrassed at such an obvious reason. She wasn’t sure if it was a compliment though it felt like one._

_“Why are you wearing a different uniform?” He asked, and it struck her how his tone of voice and question contradicted the eerie expression painted on his ANBU mask._

_“Because I failed my mission the last time we met.” _

_It humiliated her to admit that much, but she hoped he could perceive the whole truth in a spoken fragment of it._

_He let his head fall forward and threaded the fingers of one gloved hand through his unruly silver cowlicks, making a bigger mess of them. Then he removed his mask and hooked it at his waist as he pulled the scroll from his hip pouch._

_“Now, my uniform is different, too, and you’ll know it’s me, the next time.”_

_He tossed the scroll and disappeared in the same manner as their first meeting, but this time, Mei was left smiling._

“So you two got to know each other through messenger missions. Now that’s a shinobi love story if I’ve ever heard one,” Tsunade cackled. “How long did this go on?”

Mei was laughing too hard to answer, recalling portions of a conversation that spanned years.

“Did he make awkward remarks on your wardrobe every time you met? Who knew Hatake could be such an accomplished flirt,” Tsunade snickered sarcastically.

“Not every time,” Mei defended him as a particular compliment came to mind.

_“Your hair is getting long,” he remarked in a deepening baritone voice as a blush crept above his facial mask, “it suits you.”_

“I always thought his mask would put people off him, did you ever ask him about it?” Tsunade brought Mei out of her reverie.

“Yes, actually,” she replied, laughing.

_“Why do you wear a mask?” She couldn’t help her curiosity any longer._

_“I’m not, it’s here,” he said, gesturing to the ceramic mask that he’d kept at his waist for countless meetings since the first time he’d removed it._

_Mei leveled an unimpressed glare at him, knowing he was teasing her. “You know that’s not what I mean,” she deadpanned._

_The fabric of his mask wasn’t enough to conceal his smug smirk. “Because I want to, of course,” he stated matter-of-factly and laughed at her frustration._

“What an infuriating man!” Tsunade shouted, disturbing the stillness of the night around them.

“He is, rather,” Mei laughed at her friend’s outburst.

“More than you know. He complained every time I assigned a messenger mission to him. He hated them,” Tsunade chuckled into her cup of sake.

Mei’s laughter died down, recalling the time that Kakashi had said as much to her at the meeting when everything changed.

_“I hate messenger missions,” he said, coming nearer to her than he’d ever been before._

_Mei stood where she was as he approached. Kakashi had grown tall over the years of endless meetings to exchange information that never seemed to change anything about their shinobi world._

_“I hate them,” he said again, the words rumbling from his chest in his deep, baritone voice that washed over her like a soothing balm whenever she heard it._

_He continued to walk toward her, and with each step he took, Mei’s breath quickened until she could feel her chest rising and falling with every inhale and exhale_

_“But when one comes up for Kiri, I volunteer,” he said, so close that his chest touched hers._

_Mei swallowed and drew in a shaky breath. “Why?” she asked, barely able to get the word out as she closed her eyes._

_She could feel his breath fanning her face, giving away that he’d lowered his mask._

_“Because it’s the only way that I can see you, Mei,” and his lips met hers for the first time._


	15. Chapter Fourteen

“So that brat was your first kiss? I’m sorry.” Tsunade, as inebriated as she was, lost her balance a little when she laughed. She recovered before she fell and then laughed at herself even louder.

“Don’t be so hard on him,” Mei countered, aware of her own intoxication by the heat she felt in her face. “It was—”

“Sloppy?” Tsunade cackled.

“Sweet,” Mei corrected, and her giggles subsided. “He was my first everything.”

“Oh,” Tsunade tilted her head to the side. “I remember mine fondly too. Though it’s not at all like it is in novels, is it?” Her laughter burst forth again, “They never write about how dissatisfying it is.”

“Knees and elbows everywhere,” Mei could barely say the words because she laughed so hard. “We got the hang of it eventually. Don’t worry; I’m not drunk enough to go into more detail about your former subordinate, so you’ll be spared.”

“Thank you,” Tsunade lowered her head and raised her sake cup to Mei in a gesture of gratitude. “I wouldn’t have thought messenger missions would give you much time or opportunity, but youth makes anything possible, I suppose.”

“Whenever we could blame our delay on bad weather anyway,” Mei giggled. “I would make a dome of lava, which would cool and harden in the rain, and he’d use chidori to crack our way out of it again,” she smiled softly. “It was our own hidden space, where we had never been, or ever could be, enemies.”

Mei felt, rather than saw Tsunade study her face. “This wasn’t just an infatuation. You loved him,” she said as if she already knew it was a fact.

With a sigh, Mei met her friend’s eyes. “Yes.”

Tsunade leaned forward, resting her forearms on her knees, and searched Mei’s eyes. “Do you still?”

Mei sucked in a breath through trembling lips and closed her eyes. It didn’t prevent the tears from escaping them, so she opened them again. “Yes,” she whispered.

“Did he love you?” Tsunade asked gently.

“I-I think he did,” Mei wiped her tears from her face and collected herself. “We never said the words. I mean, how could we? Individually, our lives were in constant peril, and together, well, _being_ together seemed impossible. At the time, everything was falling apart.”

“It was never a secret that Kirigakure was a dangerous place,” Tsunade reclined back where she sat.

“Yes, but few outsiders knew _how_ dangerous it was. He knew because I told him,” Mei sniffed at the last of the surge of emotion. “I told him nearly everything about me, no one had ever known me so well, until you, of course,” she added, smiling at Tsunade.

Tsunade smiled warmly in reply, listening as only the best of friends do when Mei continued.

“I’d confided to him that I wished I had a mission that sent me to the Fire Temple. I wanted to know if anyone had made it there safely after we were separated at the start of the Third War. I wanted an opportunity to reclaim some of the peace I’d known when I was under the care of the monks.”

Mei’s face screwed up again as the emotion she’d fought back returned with renewed strength. “I was so tired of fighting Tsunade, and when Kisame left us, I feared for my nation as well as myself. None of us knew what we were fighting for anymore,” she covered her face with her hands.

“Zabuza attempted to overthrow the Fourth Mizukage and the council, but his reputation as the Demon of the Mist prevented him from getting enough support, and his coup failed,” Mei croaked the words out between sobs.

“I told him all of this, Tsunade. I burdened him with all of my fears. At the time, no one knew who they could trust, even within the Mist.”

Mei exhaled, exasperated with herself and paused to regain her composure. “I thought that would be the last time that I saw him, especially after what happened next.”

Mei refilled her sake cup and drank from it, hoping the burn could stop the wave of emotion, while Tsunade sat rapt with attention.

“The Fourth Mizukage was murdered, and the rogue Leaf shinobi, Itachi Uchiha, had been involved.”

Tsunade closed her eyes as a pained expression overtook her face. She exhaled audibly through her nose and then opened her eyes again to the rest of Mei’s account.

“We were scattered, leaderless,” Mei’s tears had finally stopped. “Mist Nin gathered on the mainland, hiding ourselves in the forests. We were careful to remain outside of the border of the Land of Fire, even though we were near it.

“I was on patrol. I heard a twig snap, and when I looked in the direction of the sound, I saw a dog. He stared directly at me, waiting for me to recognize him without his little vest and headband. When I realized it was Pakkun, he trotted off, leading me to his master.”

Mei met Tsunade’s eyes. “Even though he looked different, I’d never been so happy to see him.”

“He looked different?” Tsunade’s eyebrows knit together in confusion.

_“You’re wearing a different uniform,” Mei said by way of greeting her lover._

_“And you’re not,” Kakashi replied, remembering the same conversation as she._

_Mei scanned the surrounding area to ensure they were alone and then smirked at him. “Why are you wearing a different uniform?” _

_“Because I’ve been dismissed from ANBU,” he replied. “I’m supposed to be a jōnin teacher now. However, I’ve only succeeded in failing my first team of genin,” he looked down as he shuffled his feet._

_He lifted his head slightly, and even though he didn’t meet her eyes, even though he wore his mask, Mei could clearly see the seriousness that overtook his face._

_“My current rank isn’t as dangerous as my old one. I’ll be in the village more often too. I’m in a better position to, um,” he cleared his throat, further betraying his nervousness, “to be around for someone. For you,” he finally looked up at her._

_“Please don’t ask me to leave you in such a dangerous place, Mei. _Please_, Mei, come to Konoha, where I can keep you safe.”_

_The sounds of multiple pairs of footsteps were heard not far from where the lovers stood. Kakashi rushed forward, reaching for her._

_He lifted her in his arms, leaping to a broad branch high above them. Mei leaned back against the trunk of the tree, breathless at his offer._

_His hands ran up the sides of her body outside of her jōnin uniform, following her curves that she’d allowed him to know beneath it. She tilted her head back and closed her eyes, giving herself over entirely to her lover’s touch. Mei felt his fingers from one hand tangle into her hair, pulling strands loose from the bun in which she’d bound them. His other hand joined his first after tugging his mask down._

_Kakashi tilted her head to his, kissing her deeply and slowly, wordlessly expounding upon his promise. The tip of his nose pressed further and further into her cheek with the force of his kiss, and it lasted until he’d exhausted all the breath he held in his lungs._

_Kakashi tore his lips from hers and pressed their foreheads together. His breath caressed Mei’s face in gentle puffs as he whispered to her, “Lord Third is willing to offer you asylum. You wouldn’t have to fight anymore, Mei! I’ll take you to the Fire Temple. I’ll take you _anywhere_ you want to go. Please, come back with me.”_

_Mei, swept up and carried away in such a passionate, pivotal moment, nodded. “Yes, I will, Kakashi.”_

_He released the breath he held through a crooked, relieved smile, and then kissed her again, hard. “I’ll finalize everything; look for me in a week. I’ll wait for you there,” he pointed to a large tree that stood alone in the clearing at the edge of the forest. “We’ll get you out after nightfall.”_

_“Yes,” Mei whispered to him, as she smiled and blinked back the happiest tears she’d ever shed._

“But you didn’t meet him,” Tsunade prompted after Mei had stopped speaking.

Mei drew in a long, deep breath through her nose as she looked at the dying fire.

“The numbers of my generation have been whittled down through three of the Great Shinobi Wars. The remnants, the survivors, have made great sacrifices for this era of peace. Kakashi Hatake was mine.”


	16. Chapter Fifteen

A pounding headache was already waiting for Mei when she woke up the next morning.

Even with her eyes closed, she could feel how dry and itchy they were. When she opened them, the delicate skin surrounding them felt swollen and stretched thin. The morning sunlight worsened Mei’s condition, causing the dull throbbing in her head to become a piercing pain. When she rolled over, she felt nauseated. Grunting, she closed her eyes and remained still, hoping the wave of sickness would pass.

She felt Tsunade’s hand rest gently on her head, and soon after, a cooling sensation seeped into Mei’s scalp, easing her pain. “I forgot how badly tears mix with sake,” she said as soon as she was confident that she could speak without vomiting.

“You had a lot of both last night,” Tsunade laughed quietly through her nose.

The two women sat in silence until Mei’s hangover had been completely eased. She sat up and smiled sheepishly at her friend.

“Feeling better?” Tsunade asked, and Mei knew she was asking after more than just her headache.

“Yes, thank you,” she smiled again, grateful.

Tsunade’s smile faltered a little, and she searched Mei’s eyes.

“What is it?” Mei asked, concerned.

Tsunade inhaled through her opened mouth, then closed it again and shook her head. “Nothing; never mind. Let’s get washed up and have a quick breakfast before we break camp, and deliver you to the ferry,” she smiled.

Mei studied her friend’s face. The two women had grown close enough to speak their minds to each other honestly, to come to rely on each other to share their sorrow as well as their happiness. Most importantly, they listened to each other and kept what was said between them in the strictest confidence.

Tsunade had patiently waited until Mei was ready to share. Mei decided that she could extend the same to her dear friend, and didn’t push her.

Tsunade healed her own hangover as well as her friend’s, but when the women realized how late it already was, they boiled eggs while they broke camp, and ate them along with some small, sour apples and hard bread while they traveled to the coast. They laughed at their meager breakfast and at themselves, wondering how they survived on such horrid rations during their long careers as kunoichi.

Mei felt lighter as she took one chakra-fueled leap after another through the trees. Her troubles remained; there hadn’t been any resolution. However, she had faced them, had spoken them aloud, and that made them seem less intimidating.

They reached the edge of the mainland almost too quickly. Mei was sad to part with her friend even briefly after her confession from the night before. She embraced Tsunade, holding the other woman tight before she pulled away and turned to board the ferry that would take her back to Kirigakure.

“Mei, wait,” Tsunade said from behind her.

Mei turned around to regard her friend and watched as Tsunade silently struggled with whatever was causing her to hesitate before speaking again.

“I am your friend, so it pains me to say anything that would upset you. But _because_ I’m your friend, I feel I must,” Tsunade began.

Mei gave her full attention to Tsunade. The understanding that whatever Tsunade was about to say was difficult for her allowed Mei to keep an open mind when she listened.

“You’ve said that you deserve Kakashi’s indifference, and it seems that you’ve convinced yourself that you deserve worse from him. I know you think that you’re punishing yourself, but I think you’re protecting yourself instead.” Tsunade looked down and picked at one of her fingernails.

She took a deep breath and met Mei’s eyes again. “You’ve been so quick to make assumptions and let them dictate your behavior. You’re so certain that Kakashi _cannot_ forgive you, so you’ve denied him the opportunity to. Whether he will or won’t, I can’t say, but he deserves the chance to do either. You're being very unfair to him by not giving him that chance.”

Mei stood in shocked silence. Tsunade’s assessment rang loud and true, though Mei had never considered it. She’d earned such an admonishment; she couldn’t be angry with Tsunade for issuing it.

Tsunade tilted her head forward to Mei, cautious of her reaction. “Please think about it,” she gently urged.

“I will,” Mei assured her immediately. “You were right to tell me this,” she added.

Tsunade sighed, relieved, and smiled softly before she turned and waved goodbye as she departed. Mei smirked at her friend’s back before she too turned and boarded the first of several ferries that would take her home.

The last leg of her return trip to Kiri went much faster than it had when it had been the first leg of Mei’s voyage to Konoha. Only a week had passed in between, but to her, it felt like a lifetime.

The same thoughts that occupied Mei’s head whenever it came to Kakashi were still there. However, this time, she considered them from a different angle. The question on how to move forward came up often, distracting her.

For the first time, Mei found herself eager for Kakashi’s reaction, rather than wanting to avoid it. She was _so_ eager that she wished she was the one steering the boat, just so that she could turn it around and return to the Leaf instead.

When she disembarked from the final ferry, however, the dull headache had returned. Mei figured it came from too much thinking in one day, even for her. She determined that she could be satisfied with having reached a decision and that she’d be better to act on it after she’d slept a night or two in her own bed.

Mei would call Kurenai in the morning, and take that brave, first step in asking her how she could contact Kakashi at home.

Mei’s palms began to sweat at the thought of it, so she pushed it aside. She didn’t have to think about it now; she didn’t have to think about it until she was about to do it, she told herself. Instead, she thought about taking a hot bath with a calming cup of tea when she reached the door to her home.

She closed and locked the door behind her, and switched on a lamp inside her home. The sight and scent of her personal space did much to calm her nerves. She was happy to be home.

She left her suitcase where it was and walked to her kitchen to fill her teapot. Mei glanced at her telephone as she strode past it, reminding herself of her plan and that it could wait until morning.

Then, it rang.


	17. Chapter Sixteen

“Lady Mei? Oh, thank goodness you’ve made it home safely,” Kurenai’s voice came relieved on the other line.

Mei smiled on her end of the call. “Yes, I’ve only just arrived home, so your timing is perfect. I had planned on calling you in the morning.”

“Of course, there was really no need for me to worry. You’re a former Kage, and this is a time of peace,” Kurenai chattered through her nerves. “In my experience, there have been so many times that… well, I guess that my impulse to worry will never go away. I’m sorry.”

“There’s no need to apologize; I understand. It’s kind of you to worry,” Mei assured her friend.

“Thank you,” Kurenai said quietly. Then, in a brighter tone of voice, she changed the subject, “I heard from Kakashi this afternoon, with an update on Karin.”

Mei’s throat tightened at the mention of Kakashi’s and Karin’s names in the same sentence. “Oh? H-how is she?”

“Very well, I’m happy to say. There’s no reason to think there will be any long-term or lasting damage from her concussion. Beyond a few bumps and scrapes, she was otherwise uninjured in the fall. They’re all heading for home from the Fire Temple tomorrow.”

“I-I’m glad to hear it,” Mei replied, and she was, though it was difficult for her to think of the pair for reasons that Kurenai didn’t know.

“I’m embarrassed to say it, but it seems that I misjudged the depth of Karin’s affection for my friend,” Kurenai’s voice dropped in volume again, and some of the brightness had gone out of it. “I shouldn’t have scolded him so; I’m ashamed of how I acted toward him. Few people deserve happiness as much as Kakashi does, and I hope he finds it now.”

Mei felt her breath stolen from her lungs. Gutted, she was unable to reply. Thankfully, Kurenai spared her from it.

“Well, if you’ve just arrived home, I should let you go to unpack and unwind. We’ll talk again soon, I’m sure. Goodbye,” she ended.

“Yes, goodbye,” Mei gasped out and hung up the call.

She placed her hands at either side of the phone on the table in front of her, bracing herself. Her heart raced, the sound of her blood pumping in her ears overtook her hearing. Mei’s body felt heavy and as if she were freezing and burning up at the same time. She lifted her head and cast an unfocused gaze upward. Her entire world had come to a sudden stop, and all she could do was open her mouth in a silent scream.

Mei’s chest constricted, so she dropped her head and forced in gulps of air. She pushed herself from the table, ran for her bedroom, and the old journal that lay beside her bed. There would be no comfort in those pages, there never was, but it was her habit to turn to it as a reminder, as penance.

Guttural sobs escaped her as she flipped through the entries she’d written within. Tears streamed from her eyes, blurring her vision, but her fingers soon found the words that she sought.

_I hardly know what to write. Today, my name was brought forward for consideration as the Fifth Mizukage. There was opposition, of course, but I sat silent as the others argued. Later, those in support of it approached me, asking me to step up and publicly accept the nomination. I wasn’t expecting this; I asked for time to think about it. But how can I even think about accepting after the promise that I’ve made?_

Mei wiped at her eyes, but the tears kept coming as she turned the page.

_More Mist shinobi arrived today. More of my comrades arrive here every day; some of them injured. Some bring citizens with them, refugees from the lawless land that my home is quickly becoming. With each new group that arrives comes more outspoken support of my becoming the next Mizukage._

_Even if they do decide to name me Mizukage, there’s no guarantee that I would be. There’d still be a long road and a long fight ahead of us. There are some that propose we act on behalf of the nation to earn more widespread support. They are planning to hunt down the Kaguya clan that has long plagued us. Some are volunteering to go in search of Isobu. There are still those that argue against it because I’m a woman. However, several elders from the council argued that would be in my favor. I’m suspicious of them; two days ago, they were some of the loudest of those opposed. Perhaps, they think I’d be easy to control because I’m a woman? If so, they’ve chosen the wrong woman. But if I refuse, would the next candidate be as unwilling as I am to act as their puppet?_

_Three nights ago, I couldn’t sleep for excitement at the thought of leaving this place in favor of making a new life in a new home with him. Tonight, I’m kept awake by the guilt I feel for being so willing to abandon this land and my comrades. And in three nights, he’ll be expecting me to meet him._

Mei choked on sobs that wracked her body as she turned the page to read the words she already knew by heart.

_He’s out there, waiting for me, as I sit here writing this._

_What a selfish woman I am, to still wish to run to him. Who am I to think that my personal happiness should outweigh the hopes of so many? When the ninja of the Hidden Mist look at me, they see change; they see opportunity for our home. I cannot; I will not disappoint them. I’ve accepted the nomination as the Fifth Mizukage._

_I am in agony, knowing that he is so near and waiting for me when I will never meet him. I can’t even risk a letter to him; no one must ever know how close I came to abandoning them._

_I can’t bear to think of how long he’ll wait, or how he’ll feel when he returns to his home alone._

_It was inevitable that I hurt someone tonight. I’m to blame; I put myself in this wretched position. I can only hope that I suffer the worst of it. From this night forward, he will hate me, and I deserve it._

_I’m tired of fighting, and I have the biggest fight yet ahead of me. I’m frightened of what’s to come, but still, I will face it. I am broken tonight, but when I wake up, I will be dedicated to bringing change to Kirigakure. And I won’t leave it until it is a land that I would want to run to, instead of wanting to run from it._

Mei closed the journal, gripped it tightly in her hands, clutching it to her chest. Then she threw it across the room with an anguished, angry cry. If she’d known then how she would feel now, would she still have made the same decision?

_‘Yes,’_ her inner voice answered clearly and immediately.

Mei curled up on her side and pulled a blanket over herself. She cried unabashedly, letting her sorrow run its course. She couldn’t believe that she still had tears to shed, and she fell asleep before they’d stopped falling.


	18. Chapter Seventeen

Mei blinked her eyes open to the predawn world.

She had slept solidly for more hours together than she had in the last few days, and even though it was so early in the morning, her mind and body felt rested.

She pushed the blanket off of herself and realized that she’d slept in the clothes that she had traveled in the previous day. Light from the lamp that she’d neglected to turn off before she fell asleep streamed in through her bedroom doorway. Mei sat up and ran a hand over her long hair to assess how much it had snarled in her sleep. Her brush was still in her suitcase by the door, where she had left it the night before.

Mei swung her legs over the side of her bed and stood up. She shed her clothing and pulled a favorite robe from her closet. The warm, soft fibers caressed her skin as she slipped her arms through the sleeves and wrapped it around her body.

She went to her kitchen and started a pot of strong coffee. As it brewed, Mei brought her suitcase to her bedroom and unpacked it. She gathered her clothing from the floor, added them to what she had emptied from her suitcase, and threw the lot in the wash. Then, she brushed the tangles from her hair, wound her long locks into a messy bun at the top of her head, and bound them there.

Mei made her bed and turned to leave her bedroom again. She noticed her old journal lying on the floor where it had landed after she’d thrown it in anger the night before. She picked it up, ran one hand over its cover in an apology to it, and carefully returned it to its place on the nightstand beside her bed.

The welcome aroma of coffee greeted her before she’d reached her kitchen. Mei opened her cupboard to select her favorite mug and added cream and sugar to it. She poured a cup of coffee for herself, and held it in both hands, warming them as she leaned against her kitchen counter and looked out the window.

Daybreak had come, illuminating the world below it. There had been many times in Mei’s life that she found herself in a dire situation, and each time she would remind herself that the sun would still rise the next day. Without fail, it always did. She sipped her coffee, reassured, as she watched the brightening sky.

Kakashi Hatake did deserve to be happy.

Mei wouldn’t wish him otherwise. She watched the sun as it crept higher above the horizon, genuinely hoping for his happiness-even if it couldn’t be had with her-and promised it would be sufficient to satisfy her.

“Almost,” she said aloud.

Mei’s eyes fluttered closed, and she exhaled through her nose. _‘Enough,’_ her inner voice came loud and clear again, _‘enough of this. No more.’_

She opened her eyes again and looked out through her window, watching the world as it woke up until she’d finished her cup of coffee. Mei then poured another and moved forward through her day.

A long, hot shower was just what Mei needed. She scrubbed and rinsed the dirt and doldrums from herself, and let it all disappear down the drain. She emerged, reminded that she had a task waiting for her that was sure to occupy her happily.

She had a vacation in Kiri to plan for her new friends.

Mei scavenged a quick breakfast for herself from the contents of her kitchen and then set to creating a list of her favorite hot spring resorts. It quickly became a long one, too long to be accomplished in the ten days that Kurenai, Mirai, and Gai would be able to stay. Mei smiled to herself that they would just have to visit her home more than once.

She rearranged her list by location, planning a route for them to travel as she did. Then, Mei added natural landmarks or other places of note near the location of each resort. It made her realize that it wouldn’t be very relaxing at all if they spent each night at a different resort. She decided to focus on three of the islands that made up Kirigakure in which to spend their entire vacation. This would also ensure that Gai wouldn’t have to board too many ferries.

Mei sat back to look at her list and laughed at herself. What was meant to be an organized plan for their trip had become a disorganized mess of all the ideas and possibilities that she’d scribbled in her excitement. She got a fresh piece of paper and tried again to make a list that she could work with, one that wasn’t overwhelmed by notes in the margins. Once she was satisfied with it, she considered what would have to be included in the multiple reservations she’d have to arrange.

She noted that she ought to confirm that each resort had menu options and amenities that would appeal to Mirai, and that each location would be easy for Gai to access in his chair. Then, she thought of how many rooms ought to be reserved and suddenly remembered a detail that threatened her fragile happiness.

Gai had intended to invite Kakashi on this trip, and if Kakashi agreed to it, he was sure to bring Karin.

Mei’s hand that held the pen hovered over the page. She couldn’t ask Kurenai and Gai to exclude their good friend, and she couldn’t demand that Karin be left behind. She consoled herself that she was raw right now and that the trip wasn’t for another month. She reassured herself that a lot could happen in a month, and before she could overthink it, she wrote _six people needing four rooms._

Mei set the pen aside and checked her clock. It was only midafternoon. She’d finished planning their trip and was left with too much time and too little to keep her occupied.

She fought against rising anxiety, determined to find another project when it came to her — the promise she’d made to Sentoki and Zenza about helping to establish a Temple in Kiri.

Mei stood up and grabbed a few items before leaving her home. She had to go to the market anyway if she wanted to eat dinner that evening, and she could find the numbers for all of the resorts at the Mizukage Tower, so she grabbed her list as well. She left her home convinced that this would be enough to keep her busier for longer, and if not, she’d get a new hobby while she was out.

After finding the information she needed to place the reservations, Mei went to her old office. The door was open, and she stood in the doorway, smiling at Chōjūrō as he worked. He wasn’t aware of her presence, so she announced it by knocking lightly at the door.

“Lady Mei,” he greeted her with a warm smile, and she couldn’t help but return it.

“I was hoping to find you here, I’m afraid I have a rather grand scheme in mind which I’d like to discuss with you,” she approached his desk as she spoke.

Chōjūrō’s smile fell. “I’m very sorry, but the council is expecting me in a meeting that began twenty minutes ago, and then there’s this,” he gestured to a tower of paperwork near his elbow in disgust. “No matter how much progress I make through this pile, it seems to get taller instead of shorter.”

Mei hummed in understanding, “I certainly don’t miss that. I’ll put together a proposal and leave it on your desk for you another day. Only please promise that you won’t let it get lost in your inbox,” she chuckled and turned to leave him.

“Wait, I’ve just remembered that I have a message for you,” Chōjūrō stopped her before she left. “I spoke with Lord Darui yesterday, and he asked me to renew his invitation to you to visit Kumogakure.”

Mei’s eyes widened, and a smile spread across her face. Another adventure to distract her from her uneasy thoughts was the perfect solution. “Please call him back to thank him for me, and inform him that I will be there within the week.”

“But you’ve just returned,” Chōjūrō said, surprised. “How long will you be gone this time?”

“I’m not sure,” Mei said, her eyes drifting to the side as she thought. “I have to be back in a month for another trip with friends,” she returned her gaze to Chōjūrō, who couldn’t hide his astonishment. “Don’t worry, _that_ trip is planned for here in Kiri,” she assured him.

“It must be nice to come and go as you please,” he pouted.

Without his knowing, Chōjūrō’s succinct statement reminded Mei of her greatest accomplishment in life. She smiled broadly, as she felt her strength return to her, overshadowing her sorrow.

“Yes, it is,” she replied.


	19. Chapter Eighteen

Mei stood at the bow of the ship that she sailed upon, looking ahead at the Eastern Lightning Port as the boat neared it.

In the three days since accepting Darui’s invitation, she had fulfilled her promise to Chōjūrō and delivered her proposal to have a temple built in Kirigakure. The Sixth Mizukage was not surprised by it, considering Mei’s recent trip.

“Should I expect a proposal for a new landmark every time you come back from an adventure?” He asked her, laughing.

“No,” Mei chuckled. “I assure you that this temple is a long time coming, and something I should’ve done while your office was still mine. Someday, I’ll tell you about the history of monks in the Mist.”

Chōjūrō nodded. “I like the idea. I’ll present it at the next council meeting, and I’m sure that I’ll have good news for you when you return from Kumo.”

Mei had also successfully arranged and reserved the upcoming hot springs tour she had planned for the following month. She maintained her composure when she called Kurenai to relay the itinerary to her, albeit without the particulars when it came to the number of their party and obtained her address so she could mail their passes for boarding the ferries to Kirigakure. Kurenai was vocal about her excitement for their upcoming vacation, and it brought a genuine smile to Mei’s lips.

The two friends remained on the call long after Mei told Kurenai that she was about to depart for Kumogakure. Kurenai’s curiosity and her sense of adventure matched Mei’s. She spoke animatedly of all that she’d heard about the Land of Lightning and shared her speculation on what that nation must be like. Mei had promised to bring Kurenai’s telephone number with her, so she could call her while she was there, and tell her all about it.

Mei treated herself to the pleasure of over-packing for her impromptu trip to Kumo. She justified it by not knowing what to expect while she was there, so it followed that she’d need an outfit for any occasion. Rather than haul three or four suitcases with her, she sealed everything she thought she’d need and more within a single scroll.

The International Railway did not connect the lands of Water and Lightning. Mei went by ferry from the largest island where the Village Hidden in the Mist was located to the next nearest island northwest of it. She took another, longer ferry to the larger of two small islands further northwest. From there, she boarded a ship for the longest part of her journey across the Chigiri Sea to the Land of Lightning. After she arrived at the Eastern Lightning Port, she would travel west by train across the nation to the Hidden Cloud Village.

Mei had been to that village prior to the Fourth Shinobi War. Ei, while he was still the Fourth Raikage, had been named the Supreme Leader of the Allied Shinobi Forces. As such, he had summoned the Kages to discuss how the alliance should be organized, as well as what to do with the two remaining jinchūriki. Although Mei had been thankful to see Tsunade returned to full health, it had been an otherwise tense meeting. There had been no time to admire the view from the Raikage’s office windows, and when it was over, Naruto and Killer B were ordered to Turtle Island, and Mei left to fulfill her duty as a protector of the Daimyō.

She blinked to clear the past from her eyes and disembarked from the boat. Before Mei could ask for directions to the train station, she heard her name ground out in a low, gravelly voice.

“Welcome, Lady Mei, to the Land of Lightning.” Ei stood apart from the crowd gathered on the dock.

“Lord Ei,” she said in greeting when she neared him. “I wasn’t expecting you to meet me.”

Ei appeared confused by this. “Why wouldn’t I? I told you that I would accompany you during your visit here.”

Mei recalled the details of the rushed conversation they’d had in the hallway of the guest wing in the Hokage’s Tower. “Yes, you did,” she sighed.

“This displeases you?” He asked.

“No,” Mei was quick to recover. Ei was the last person she’d want to irritate, even if he wasn’t her first choice as her escort.

Ei looked as if he wasn’t convinced. He glanced down and smoothed the front of his black kimono with his remaining right hand. “I know that I’m not the most genteel man,” he began, and Mei struggled to contain a snicker. “However, is it so unbelievable that I would like to see my home through the eyes of a visitor?”

“O-of course not!” Mei’s voice rose, emphasizing her earnest reply. “I can understand that completely,” she added in a quieter tone.

“Good,” Ei nodded, seeming to calm again. “Do you have luggage?”

Mei giggled, choosing to withhold the detail of how _much_ she’d packed. “I’ve sealed everything in a scroll this time.”

“You’re quickly becoming an accomplished traveler,” Ei smirked at her. “Then let’s begin,” he gestured for Mei to walk beside him.

The pair boarded the train, and soon after they were seated, it lurched forward, gradually peaking at its high rate of speed. After the slow pace of the boat, Mei felt a bit dizzy. However, she was no less impressed by this modern mode of travel, and Ei kept her distracted with his enthusiastic descriptions and explanations of the scenery that they traveled past too quickly to be enjoyed.

“I hope that you don’t mind taking the train,” Ei said after praising the beauty of a river that ran the length of the Land of Lightning as they crossed over it. “I’ve chosen several destinations that represent the best of this nation to show you, but few are within an easy walking distance.”

“I don’t mind at all,” Mei replied. It increased her excitement to know that he had planned the trip out in advance, just like she had for her friends when they were expected to visit Kiri.

“I only have one thing planned for today, so that you can settle into your guest quarters in the Raikage Tower, and rest after your journey,” Ei went silent as the next scheduled stop was announced. “This is where we’ll get off the train,” he said, smiling at her.

Mei was surprised at his thoughtfulness and returned his smile. “Isn’t the Hidden Cloud Village the next stop?”

“Yes, but the train isn’t the only new way to travel there,” Ei’s smile grew wider.

Mei could tell he was proud of whatever surprise he had lined up for her, so she didn’t push for fear of spoiling it.

They stepped off the train, and Mei found herself near the base of the mountains in which the Hidden Cloud was nestled. They were quite different from the mountains she’d recently seen in the Land of Fire. They weren’t great behemoths of dark grey stone that looked like they’d broken off and fallen from somewhere high above. These were narrower structures of granite the color of sand that looked like they’d been pushed up from deep below underground. They were misshapen, the tops rounded, the sides exfoliated, weathered by centuries.

Ei called to her to follow him off the platform of the train station. Then he ushered her into a cable car that would take them high into the mountains. Aside from the top where it was connected to the track it followed, it was made entirely of strong glass, providing a near three-hundred-and-sixty-degree view as they ascended.

“Is it safe?” Mei knew it was a silly question, but she couldn’t help asking it in her nervousness when she was lifted off the ground.

“I promise it is,” Ei laughed at her, his coarse voice rebounding around the enclosed space of the cable car.

As the cable car took them higher, their view of the mountains disappeared in fog. At first, it reminded Mei of the famous Kiri jutsu, the Hiding in the Mist Technique. But whereas that was like so much swirling vapor intended to obscure an opponent’s vision, this was impenetrable. Droplets of water gathered and streaked down the side of the glass of the cable car, but beyond that were only thick clouds that encased them. Not even shadows or silhouettes of the mountains could be discerned.

Ei seemed to anticipate her reaction and was amused by it. “The mountains are still there; you’ll see them again soon.”

“It’s almost like slipping into a genjutsu,” Mei remarked as she peered out.

True to Ei’s word, the clouds thinned as they approached the end of the cable car track. When it came to a stop, Ei got out and extended his right hand to assist Mei out as well.

“It’s a shame that we’re robbed the view of the mountains as we’re climbing up them,” she said.

“Most mountains are best viewed when looking up,” Ei spoke as he led Mei on a short path that took them higher. “But these mountains are best viewed when looking down,” he finished when they reached the top.

Mei looked around and gasped at the countless unique mountains, oddly shaped and poking up from the clouds. Dark green vegetation and gnarled pines wrapped around them like long, winding bodies of dragons. The clouds themselves clung to the sides of the mountains, sweeping past them.

“Beautiful,” she said breathlessly.


	20. Chapter Nineteen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: The Fourth Raikage is often referred to as “A.” However, that is also the sixth most common word in the English language. I found his name spelled as “Ei” in some English translations and have chosen to use that spelling to avoid confusion between the word “a” and his character.

Ei escorted Mei to her quarters in the Raikage Tower and then departed after they had settled on what time to meet the next morning. When she opened the door, she walked into the first of three rooms that made up a spacious guest suite. It was a sitting room furnished with a small table and inviting chairs. There were tall, wide windows that provided the room’s most prominent feature, the grand view that lay beyond it.

The next rooms were a bedroom and a private attached bath. Both were equally luxurious and seemed to eagerly await the moment that Mei would unpack and settle in. She unfurled the scroll she’d used to pack her items in and laid it on the bed. She completed a series of hand signs to release the first of several seals that she’d organized her belongings within and repeated this step until everything was put away.

Mei returned to the sitting room, and the telephone that was provided for guests to use. Beside it lay a directory and suggestions for restaurants that would deliver meals to the Raikage Tower. As she perused the options, there was a knock at her door.

“Good evening, Lady Mei.” Darui, the Fifth Raikage, stood at her door with a paper bag in his hand. “Are your rooms acceptable? Do you have everything that you need?”

“Yes, thank you, Lord Raikage. It’s lovely,” Mei replied, gesturing to the room. “It’s kind of you to greet me. How are you?”

“Drowning in dull paperwork,” he muttered in his lazy voice, “but somebody’s gotta do it. Watching Lord Ei enjoy his life inspires me to retire early.”

Mei laughed at his frank and correct complaint of a Kage’s daily life. “Too much time on your hands can be a curse as well as a blessing,” she offered.

“I suppose. Lord Ei started hanging around the office again two weeks after he retired,” Darui laughed. “Ever since we returned from Naruto’s inauguration, he’s kept himself busy planning this tour of the Land of Lightning for you. I and my office windows thank you for coming,” he bowed to her.

Mei laughed at this as well, for Ei was famous for his preferred and destructive mode of exiting the Raikage’s office. “It’s my pleasure to be here. The cable car trip was breathtaking, and I’m excited for whatever surprise he has planned for tomorrow.”

“He’s taking you to a new monument that hasn’t opened to the public yet. You’ll be its first visitor, and I wish that I could join you to see your reaction. I hope that you will tell me what you think of it after you’ve been there.”

“Of course,” Mei replied, her curiosity heightened.

“Well, I should deliver this to you before it gets cold,” Darui offered the paper bag that he carried to her. “You’ll find that our local cuisine tends to be spicy, too spicy for some travelers’ taste buds. I hope that you don’t mind, but I’ve selected a milder, favorite dinner of mine from a nearby restaurant for you to enjoy on the first evening of your vacation here.”

“That’s very considerate of you, thank you, Lord Raikage.” Mei accepted the meal and smiled at him. “The hospitality that Kumogakure has shown me is exceptional,” she praised him.

Darui returned her smile. “I’m glad to hear it, and I hope that when others learn of it, they will want to visit too. If you need anything, my office is listed in the directory, and I promise you won’t be interrupting me. In fact, please interrupt me while I sort through all of my dull paperwork,” he chuckled and bowed his departure.

Met sat to eat her dinner, and after a few bites, referred to the directory again to order hot tea to compliment it. She was surprised to learn how much she appreciated having decisions made for her, as it regarded her trip thus far. It wasn’t an experience she’d like to apply to other areas of her life, but the knowledge that her hosts had thought of her, had carefully considered her preferences, was touching.

Her tea arrived when she had finished her meal. Mei poured a cup for herself and sat with it in one of the chairs near the window. She blew on her tea to cool it as she looked out at the dark silhouettes of the mountains against the night sky. Mei switched off the lamp that illuminated her room so that she could better see the stars that had begun to emerge.

Mei felt content, so content that she could address the tenacious thoughts of Kakashi that clung to her mind.

Did she truly wish that he was there with her?

She thought about their current relationship as opposed to the one they’d cultivated decades before. Now, the space between them was thick with tension, clouded with guilt, and Mei hated the apprehension she felt whenever he was near.

Tsunade’s reluctant scolding showed Mei just how much she was to blame for that.

She still meant to reconcile with him, even if it didn’t yield the result that she desired most. Mei smiled at the memory of Kakashi’s face as it appeared when she was reunited with her friend at the Fire Temple. Perhaps, he _could_ forgive her for the pain she caused him in the past. There was still enough tenderness between them that he could be genuinely happy for her, and she for him.

Mei stopped there before sadness and dissatisfaction could creep in to sully her quiet contemplation. She reminded herself that she was in control of her thoughts, that the past and the future exist in places that are far removed from the present. The only way that Kakashi could cast a shadow on her current adventure would be if _she_ let him. She returned to her tea and immersed herself in the surroundings of the moment.

Her contentment returned by the time she reached the bottom of her teacup. Mei drew a hot bath and soaked in it until relaxation gave way to drowsiness. She eased into bed and a night of restful sleep with happy thoughts of what the next day would bring.


	21. Chapter Twenty

Mei spent the morning of her second day in Kumogakure much like she had the first, sitting on a train and admiring the view from her window as they traveled northeast.

Unlike her, Ei was not a morning person. He had greeted her politely when they met but seemed to function automatically from then on as they made their way to the train station. It wasn’t until they were nearing the end of their train ride and his third cup of coffee that the art of conversation returned to him.

“This is the first of two destinations I have in mind for today,” he spoke in a voice that was a little less groggy than the one in which he’d first greeted her.

“Lord Darui told me it hadn’t been opened to the public yet. I’m honored to be the first outsider to visit it,” Mei recalled this detail from her conversation with the Fifth Raikage the evening before.

“What else did he tell you about it?” Ei blurted his question out, proving his quick temper had woken up as well.

“N-nothing,” Mei returned, taken aback. “He didn’t want to spoil the surprise,” she added.

“Good,” Ei huffed, his nostrils flaring. “The site is still in a state of preparation to accommodate visitors. When we’re closer to unveiling it, we’ll hold an opening ceremony, and invite all the dignitaries that were a part in forming the International Alliance,” he continued in a softer tone of voice.

Mei’s quizzical expression prompted him to offer one final hint about their first destination. “We’re going to the site where the Allied Shinobi Forces Headquarters once stood," he said reverently.

“Oh,” Mei said with a sharp inhale.

The Allied Shinobi Forces Headquarters had housed some of the bravest and best minds of the alliance. Although it hadn’t been situated on the battlefields that saw the clashes of the Fourth Great Shinobi War, it had served as a central intelligence location. Information gathered there, was processed, and strategies formed through the visual prowess, mind-link communications, and genius of those elite ninjas that were stationed there. They all knew the dangerous position they were in. After the inevitable threat was issued, they remained there, still giving all the information they had, encouraging their comrades that fought on the ground up until the very last moment. The abrupt silence that filled the minds of every allied shinobi signaled that the Ten-Tails’ ferocious attack had met its mark, resulting in the total destruction of the headquarters and those within it.

“This is our stop,” Ei brought Mei out of her reverie. She hadn’t even noticed that the train had slowed.

It wasn’t a far walk from the station to their destination. Currently, it was marked by a barrier of fences with tarps over them to hide it from the view of passersby.

“We’re still paving a path for visitors to follow when they come here and when that’s complete, handrails will need to be installed,” Ei explained as they neared the outer barrier. “From here on, I’d recommend channeling chakra to your feet to help you keep your footing.”

Mei took his advice and did as Ei suggested. Once she concentrated her chakra to her feet, she could feel the secure ground beneath loose gravel and uneven stone through an enhanced sense of touch.

“I was the Supreme Leader of the Allied Shinobi Forces, and it was my orders that they followed here. They fulfilled their duty, so I will fulfill mine and honor them.” Ei pulled one end of a tarp aside, revealing an entrance for Mei to walk through.

Even under construction, the memorial was stark. There was no trace of the building that had once stood there. A portion of the crater that had been left behind from the Tailed Beast Ball’s impact, as well as the ridge of earth that edged it, had been preserved. The only modification to it was found at the bottom where a group of newly-planted saplings stood, encircled by five narrow pillars of black marble.

“When visitors arrive, they will follow this circular path around the whole memorial,” Ei said as he ushered Mei along the designated path he spoke of. “Then, they will descend there,” he pointed across from them, “where they can amble around in another smaller circle, before taking the path to exit.”

Mei nodded, keeping her eyes on the saplings and marble pillars below them. They descended along the path Ei had pointed out that took them to the bottom of the crater. Upon closer inspection, Mei could see the emblems of each of the five hidden shinobi villages etched into the black marble pillars.

Ei cleared his throat. “I’ve chosen circles to represent equality and balance among our five great nations. The trees represent—“

“Those lives that were lost here,” Mei interrupted him in a quiet voice.

“Yes,” he confirmed in a solemn tone.

They had come to the end of the smaller, circular path and stopped. “We’ve all given up something precious to us for this era of peace, but they gave the most for it, knowing they’d never see it,” Mei spoke again in the same soft tone. “This is a fitting memorial, simple but powerful. You’ve honored them well.”

“Thank you,” Ei bowed his head. Then he looked up again, “Your good opinion is worth earning, so I’m glad that you approve.”

Mei tilted her head to the side as she regarded him. Here stood the same man that had practically frothed at the mouth while he accused her and the others as his distrust of them peaked during their summit in the Land of Iron.

“You’ve benefited from the alliance,” she observed. “Well, that goes without saying really. We’ve all benefited from it; our whole world has,” Mei gestured with her arm. “Individually, we’re better people for it too,” she said as she took one last look at the saplings.

The pair then bowed to the saplings and exited the memorial in silence.

“Would you like to stop for lunch before we get back on the train?” Ei asked her when they had put some distance between them and the memorial behind them.

“Sure,” Mei assented, though a little confused. “I thought you had two destinations in mind for today?”

“I do, we passed it on our way,” Ei smiled. “As much as I wanted to bring you here, I didn’t want the day to end on a somber note.”

Mei continued to be surprised by Ei’s thoughtfulness. She decided that showcasing the best of his home brought out the best of him, as well.

A light meal and a quick train ride through the Valley of Cloud and Lightning later, they arrived at their second destination for the day. It was an inland lake, the largest within the Land of Lightning.

“This is a place of historical significance,” Ei said as the two chose seats on a boat that would take them on a tour around the lake. “Over time, however, truth and myth became confused. Now, it is a lake of legends.”

“Will you tell me of these legends as we sail around it?” Mei asked, intrigued.

“I won’t have to,” Ei said as the same mischievous smile he’d worn for most of Mei’s trip returned to his face.

Mei couldn’t help laughing at how satisfied Ei seemed to be with himself as she settled into her seat and waited patiently for the boat to set sail.

The lake was home to many legends, and each one was sung rather than spoken by performers stationed around it. The stories of jealous wives of Feudal Lords, yōkai fish, star-crossed lovers that leaped to their fates, and the ghosts of the clans of Kumogakure surrounded them. Those on the boat applauded after every tale.

Ei told Mei of the thriving fine arts community in the Land of Lightning as they rode the train back to the Hidden Cloud. “The mountains have attracted painters and poets here for centuries,” he said. “We have a center dedicated to the fine arts near the Raikage Tower. One wing holds a gallery where we display innumerable paintings of the mountains. In another wing, concerts are held every week.”

Mei gaped at him, surprised speechless.

Ei laughed at her astonishment, “I’ve learned from my brother that musicians need a place to perform.”

Mei joined his laughter, recalling Killer B’s spontaneous outbursts.

“The next performance will be held the evening after tomorrow,” Ei’s laughter died down as he continued. “It’s a string quartet, and when I told them of your visit, they offered to dedicate their performance to you.”

Mei squeezed her hands together in her lap and looked down at them.

“Don’t you like music?” Ei asked, concerned.

“No, it’s not that,” Mei raised her eyes to meet Ei’s. “I’m overwhelmed is all. I-I have a difficult time accepting compliments,” she prattled

“Why?” He uttered, shocked. He didn’t give her much time to answer, instead adding, “I hope that you will become accustomed to enjoying them.”

Mei looked out the window for a moment before deciding to change the subject. “If that’s two nights from now, what do you have planned for tomorrow?” Then she laughed, “If I’ve learned anything from this trip, it’s that you _must_ have something planned.”

Ei’s lips curled into a smile. “Since you expressed an interest in temples, I’m taking you to the unique one of Kumogakure. Tomorrow, we go to Turtle Island.”


	22. Chapter Twenty-One

From the moment it came into view, Turtle Island appeared inhospitable.

“_This_ is where you ordered Naruto and B?” Mei gaped at the carcasses of savage creatures impaled on spikes that protected the perimeter of the island. She turned to face Ei, incredulous. “To keep them_ safe?_”

“This is a training ground,” Ei explained, “like the Forest of Death in Konohagakure. Isn’t there a designated place for challenging shinobi while they train in the Hidden Mist?”

“The entire nation was our training ground,” Mei replied, returning her gaze to the horror she was sailing toward.

“I suppose it was,” Ei paused as he considered her answer. “This, however, is a special training ground reserved for jinchūriki. The temple, as well as the entire island it sits upon, is designed to help them gain control over the tailed beast sealed within them.”

“Do monks live here too?” Mei asked as her curiosity continued to grow with every answer Ei gave.

“It’s not that kind of temple,” he replied. “You’ll see. This is where B formed a bond with the Eight-Tails and mastered it. There is a barrier around the island to detect and deflect any threat from outside of it. Naruto was safe while he was allowed to train here because B held the respect of all the creatures of Turtle Island, except one.”

At these words, the sea began to churn around their boat. They were rocked about as the water roiled beneath them. Massive tentacles broke through the surface, and the triangle-shaped head of giant squid began to emerge.

“I take it this is the one beast that B _didn’t_ tame,” Mei spoke as she calmly assessed the threat.

“Yes,” Ei growled, assuming a fighting stance.

Mei sucked in a deep breath and prepared to spew acid at the squid, but Ei interrupted her.

“Wait, we don’t want to kill it. It’s still part of the island’s defense. Conjure a water dragon and send it after one of the tentacles.”

Mei sent chakra to her feet to keep her secured to the boat while the thrashing waves tossed it. She wove hand signs, and a water spout burst from the turbulent sea. It elongated and took on the form of a deep blue dragon, complete with fangs and claws. With a wave of her hand, the dragon lunged for the squid and bit down on one of its writhing tentacles.

Bright, crackling energy cloaked Ei as he ran on the surface of the agitated waves toward the water dragon. He reached his right hand into the body of it, sending a current of electricity through it. It jolted the giant squid, which then curled in on itself and retreated.

The sea calmed again, and Ei walked back to the boat. “We make a good team,” he said with a satisfied smirk.

Mei chuckled, “Will we have to employ combination attacks all the way through to the temple?”

“No,” Ei laughed in return. “B isn’t the only one that’s respected on this island.”

“Good,” Mei said, relieved, as Ei moored their boat.

Once she was beyond the dangerous spikes, Mei found plenty to admire about Turtle Island. The island and everything on it seemed enhanced, larger-than-life.

One imposing animal after another crept out from the lush growth to inspect the two visitors. They would bow to Ei upon recognizing him and then return to wherever they’d come from, hidden from view again.

The pair made their way through the interior of the island until they came to a stop before a waterfall that collected into a pool at the base of it. There was a small section of exposed land where one could sit and admire it.

“This location is known as the Falls of Truth,” Ei spoke, “and behind it is the Tailed Beast Temple.”

He turned his back to the waterfall and faced Mei. “This is the first trial for jinchūriki to complete when mastering their tailed beast. They sit there in meditation,” he pointed to the small piece of mossy ground before the waterfall, “until their true self is revealed to them.”

Ei reached his hand out to her. “We are not jinchūriki and do not need to test ourselves. We will pass directly through the waterfall; I’ll guide you to the temple.”

Although reluctant, Mei took his hand. As they walked on the surface of the pool toward the waterfall, she heard a woman moan, _‘Why?’_

Mei stopped. Ei turned to look at her over his shoulder. “Come, let’s pass through it quickly,” he urged her.

Mei nodded as she began walking again, and again she heard the woman’s cry. _‘Why?’_

It had come louder this time, and Mei recognized the voice as her own. Ei pulled her through the waterfall, and the shadow of her reflection appeared in her mind, lamenting, _‘Why won’t you fight for **me**?’_

Mei emerged on the other side of the waterfall, shaken. The question rang in her mind, making her chest ache. She blinked at her new surroundings.

They were in a huge cavern. It was large enough to house an entire temple built within it. The structure was adorned with three tall, blue spires, and guarded by two rows of headless Bodhisattvas. The sight of them did nothing to calm her nerves.

Mei’s breath came fast and ragged. Beyond the sound of her heart’s frantic beating, she could hear Ei as he pointed out the murals of the Two-Tails and the Eight-Tails. “Beyond here is a chamber designed to hold a tailed beast, should its jinchūriki fail to control it—”

“I’m sorry,” Mei interrupted him. “I-I, excuse me,” she said before turning and leaping through the waterfall again.

Her reflection’s pained cry echoed in Mei’s ears as she jumped through the falls. She landed on the small circle of land, turned to face the waterfall, and then sat down in front of it.

Behind her closed eyes, her reflection emerged from the Falls of Truth. She appeared just as Mei had seen herself in her Infinite Tsukuyomi dream, dressed for her wedding day. “The dream came from you,” she said to her reflection.

_‘Yes,’_ she replied. _‘We were so close,’_ she whined as if she was helpless, and it angered Mei to hear it.

“It wasn’t real!” Mei yelled at her.

Her reflection’s head flopped to one side like a rag doll causing her bridal veil to fall across her face.

“I didn’t even know who I was marrying!” Mei shouted again, shocked that her reflection could be satisfied with it.

_‘Because you refused the only one you ever wanted,’_ her reflection spoke again in that same pained voice.

“Stop,” Mei whispered.

_‘You refused him; you gave him up…’_

“Please, stop,” Mei whimpered in the same helpless tone she couldn’t stand a moment before.

_‘… Even now, all you can do is run away from him…’_

Mei felt her knees buckle beneath her as her reflection came closer.

_‘Why?’_ Her reflection screeched. _‘You can fight _for_ an entire nation; you can fight on _behalf _of an entire nation. Why won’t you fight for **me**?’_

Mei couldn’t meet her reflection’s eyes. “I—”

Her reflection stood above her, and Mei stared at the hem of the wedding gown she wore. _‘Now you’ve driven him to another,’_ the other woman snarled.

“Enough!” Mei shrieked as she felt someone shaking her.

“Lady Mei!” Ei had his hand on her shoulder, his eyes peering deep into hers.

“Lord Ei?” Mei asked, startled, in a weak voice that she barely recognized as her own.

He let his hand fall from her shoulder as he continued to study her face. After a moment, he lifted his hand again and brushed his thumb beneath Mei’s left eye.

She was humiliated to have shed a tear in front of such a man, and even more so to have him wipe it away. “I can’t believe that to be my true self,” she muttered in her embarrassment.

“It’s not,” he replied in a quieter voice than she’d ever heard from him. “That part of you represents what you do your best to hide from yourself. It’s only after you make peace with it that your true self is revealed.”

“Have you been able to achieve that peace?” Mei asked, finally beginning to calm.

Ei glanced at the Falls of Truth from the corner of his eye. “I’d rather take my chances with the squid again.”

Mei laughed at him, and he turned to her again.

“I shouldn’t have brought you here, I’m sorry,” he said.

“Please don’t apologize; it’s my fault,” Mei stammered.

Ei looked at her intently, as if he was carefully considering his next words. “I’ve wanted to show you the best of the Land of Lightning because I want you to enjoy it well enough to stay here. With me,” his eyes darted between hers as he took her hand in his.

Mei blinked in surprise. “Lord Ei, I appreciate your offer, but I couldn’t possibly—”

“Don’t give your answer now. I’m sure you’re still upset by whatever you saw in the waterfall. Once you’ve rested and have had time to consider my offer, I’m sure that you’ll see sense in it and accept. We aren’t getting any younger,” he chuckled.

Mei raised one eyebrow, astonished at how sure he seemed to be of himself.

“I have some business to take care of on behalf of Kumo tomorrow, but we still have the concert to attend in the evening. I look forward to your answer then,” Ei said as he gestured for Mei to follow him back to the boat that would take them away from Turtle Island.


	23. Chapter Twenty-Two

It was well past dinner time, and though she hadn’t eaten since breakfast, she had no appetite. Instead, Mei paced restlessly across the sitting room of her guest suite in the Raikage Tower.

Her mind was a crowded place of thoughts and emotions that she couldn’t make sense of. Mei was trapped in a vicious cycle of surprise at Ei’s offer, outrage at his assumption that she was sure to accept him, and self-loathing. She would have packed the moment she returned to her quarters and left if it wasn’t for the performance that was to be held in her honor the following evening.

Mei was at her wit’s end as she came to a halt and looked out the wide windows at the view beyond them. However, even the beauty of the mountains had become tarnished by her foul mood.

She wished that Tsunade would suddenly appear as she so often did. Mei could’ve done with a dose of her friend’s frankness to cut through the fog of her frantic thoughts. But that was impossible. In her hurry to run away-as her reflection had rightly pointed out beneath the Falls of Truth-she’d neglected to tell her friend where she could be found.

Then Mei remembered that another friend_ did_ know where she was. Not only that, she was expecting a call from Mei, as well.

Mei strode into the bedroom and the nightstand drawer where she kept Kurenai’s telephone number. She poured a glass of water from the tap in the adjoining bath and settled in for a long chat as she dialed her friend’s number.

“Hello,” Kurenai’s voice was serene even over the telephone, and it had an immediate, positive effect on Mei.

“Hello, Kurenai,” Mei smiled into the phone. “It’s not too late at night to call, is it?”

“Lady Mei, I was hoping to hear from you.” Kurenai’s tone of voice went from polite to cheerful. “It’s not late here; Kumo is a couple of hours ahead of Konoha.”

“Good, because I have a lot to tell you,” Mei began.

Except for the memorial at the Allied Shinobi Forces Headquarters and that day’s trip to Turtle Island, Mei recounted all of her journey to Kurenai. Through her recollections of the cable car ride up into the mountains, and the tour around the lake, Mei found that the harsh view she held of her host had softened.

Ei proved that he wasn’t the brute of a man that he used to be. He had surprised Mei time and again with his thoughtfulness. He’d even managed to seem gentle in some instances, and some part of Mei, perhaps the one she’d encountered beneath the Falls of Truth, urged her to consider his offer further.

Ei was correct; they weren’t getting any younger. And Kakashi wasn’t hers anymore, nor had he been for a very long time.

Mei had moved the telephone receiver from one ear to the other so many times that both were red and sore. She began to wrap up the call after she’d finished telling Kurenai of the planned concert for the following evening.

“Oh wait, before you go,” Kurenai caught her between saying goodbye and hanging up. “I forgot to tell you that I received the boarding passes for the ferries to Kiri, but I think there’s been a mistake because you’ve sent too many.”

“I thought Gai was going to invite Lord Sixth?” Mei asked.

“He did, and Kakashi is coming with us,” Kurenai answered. “However, you’ve sent passes for five people, were we supposed to invite someone else?”

“No,” Mei continued, confused. “It’s for Karin.”

“Karin? Why would she come?”

“Y-you said that you’d mistaken the depth of her affection for him,” Mei felt her throat tighten as she spoke, “so I thought…” she trailed off.

“No—I-I mean, yes, I did,” Kurenai stammered. “It seems she didn’t care as much for Kakashi after all. At least, not after she realized that Suigetsu had come running to her aid the moment he learned of her accident.”

Mei opened and closed her mouth, speechless.

“It seems that even Karin can discern the difference between a passing fancy and genuine affection. I’d guess that they were just too busy bickering to have discovered it sooner.”

“So, Karin and Suigetsu…?” Mei barely managed to speak her broken thought.

“Yes,” Kurenai confirmed.

“Oh,” Mei said, and it was all that she _could_ say, so she repeated it, “oh.”

“Well, I’m sure that you’re tired, so I’ll let you go to rest. We can discuss what to do with the extra pass when you return home from Kumo,” Kurenai suddenly seemed to be in a hurry to end the call.

“Oh—I mean, yes. Thank you. Goodbye,” Mei said and hung up.

She remained sitting in the chair for some time as her eyes looked everywhere without seeing anything. Then, Mei shot up and began pacing again, wringing her hands as she did. She could barely think of the next twenty-four hours; she could only think of what to do once they’d expired.

She’d leave Kumo, and go to Konoha before returning to Kiri.

The thought made her breath catch from excitement and fear. Mei closed her eyes to the fear, willing it away, and her appetite returned tenfold.

Though her ears still burned, Mei quickly scanned her dinner options and ordered the first two items from the first restaurant that would still deliver to the Raikage Tower that late at night. She hung up the phone without knowing or caring about what she’d requested for dinner. She laughed at herself that it was an inconsequential detail at such a moment.

Mei looked out the window and welcomed the hope that began to fill her again. It warmed her from the inside out. She wrapped her arms around herself, savoring it, and focused on her reflection in the glass, instead of the mountains that lay beyond it.

“Forgive me,” she appealed to the pair of eyes that looked back at her. “Please forgive me,” she repeated, “but I’m going to risk it again.” Mei felt, as well as saw, her lips tremble.

She sucked in a shuddering breath to brace herself. “I can promise you this, though. I _am_ going to fight for you this time.”


	24. Chapter Twenty-Three

Sunlight flooded the bedroom of Mei’s guest suite, but rather than greet it, she rolled over with a groan and pulled a pillow over her head to block it out.

As if Mei’s turbulent mind hadn’t been enough to keep her up all night, her dinner guaranteed that she wouldn’t sleep. The moment her food was delivered, and she was sure there would be no witnesses to her gluttony, Mei practically inhaled the meal. Two-thirds of it had been ingested when she was forced to remember Darui’s warning of how spicy the cuisine of Kumo could be.

The pain was excruciating, worse than when she lay broken and bleeding on the battlefield of the Fourth Great Shinobi War. Mei had fallen to her knees, her mouth burning with a fire that was far more powerful than the lava she could produce. She clutched her throat with one hand and pounded the floor with the fist of the other. At one point, she considered chewing the leaves from the houseplants that adorned her suite to see if they could provide any relief.

In the end, she remained sprawled out on her back on the floor until her searing suffering subsided. Mei was sure that the insides of her cheeks were blistered as she collected what remained of her meal and flung it from one of the windows in her sitting room.

Shortly after she’d limped off to bed, the second phase of the curse of Cloud’s cuisine was initiated. Mei frequently ran to her adjoining bath throughout the night, recalling all of the deities she’d ever heard of to thank them for how near the bathroom was or to pray to them for it to end. By the time dawn had started to stain the sky pink, she was exhausted, hollow, and finally able to sleep.

Mei couldn’t guess at how many hours had passed since then, but she still didn’t feel rested at all. She peeled her tongue off the roof of her mouth and smacked her parched lips. She wanted to brush her teeth and knew she ought to drink water, but she remained still, hoping sleep would come back to claim her for a little while longer.

Her eyes flew open when she heard a knock at the door to her guest suite. Mei could only think of one person that would come unannounced, and he was the last person that she wanted to see. She had no desire to encounter Ei until that evening when she would make her refusal of his offer clear to him. Her eyes drifted closed again as she ignored the second round of knocking; she was in no fit state to greet anyone, anyway.

Then again, perhaps that could work to her advantage.

Mei reopened her eyes, and she considered the possibility of revealing the horror of her morning self to Ei. Maybe if he saw the disheveled, stinking reality of what he’d wake up to every day, it would help to soften the blow when she turned him down.

She threw back the covers and launched herself out of bed. She reached the door of her guest suite and pulled it open just as the third round of knocking had ended. She stood in the doorway, hoping that the worst version of herself was enough to frighten any future romantic advances that Ei might attempt.

However, it wasn’t Ei that was standing in the hallway.

“G-good morning, Lord Sixth,” Mei was beyond mortified. Kakashi stood in front of her, spotless and perfect in the crisp uniform he still wore, even in retirement. One hand gripped the handle of his suitcase, which he kept close beside him.

“Good afternoon, Lady Fifth,” he replied.

“Is it really?” Mei’s nerves erupted in the ridiculous question.

“Is it really, what?” Kakashi answered her question with a question.

“Afternoon,” Mei muttered, her eyes drifting to the sunlight streaming from her window.

“Yes,” he answered, succinctly.

Mei hummed in astonishment. Then she attempted to do more than just make noise, “I didn’t know you were coming to Kumo,” she repositioned herself, attempting to hide behind her door.

“This wasn’t a planned trip; I took the night train and arrived early this morning. Lord Ei has been kind enough to show me around when Lord Darui proved too busy to meet with me,” he said, his eyes drifting downward.

“How long are you staying?” Mei squeaked the question out, smoothing her hair down with one hand.

His eyes shot up to hers, “I’m not. I regret that I won’t be able to attend the concert in your honor this evening, but I must return to Konoha right away. I only stopped to let you know that I will inform Kurenai and Gai of the change in your circumstances and that it would most likely postpone the trip to Kiri. Also,” Kakashi swallowed audibly, “I wanted to congratulate you.”

“Congratulate me?” Mei’s eyes darted between Kakashi’s, searching them.

“On your upcoming wedding,” he explained.

Mei’s mouth fell open, and several moments passed before she could close it. She carefully deliberated over her next words as she could feel her temper rise. “Thank you, Lord Sixth, for your kindness and consideration. However, I’m afraid that you have been misinformed.”

Kakashi’s eyes widened, “M-m,” he stuttered, then tried again. “Misinformed?”

“Yes,” Mei confirmed, nodding her head, “and I would appreciate it if you would correct anyone that is spreading such a false rumor.”

“I… I-I-I, yes, I’ll do that,” Kakashi stammered, his eyes still wide with shock. He drew in a breath and uttered, “Uh—”

Mei waited for him to continue, but he didn’t. He bowed to her stiffly, then turned and walked down the hall.

She leaned out of the doorway of her guest quarters to watch him as he went a few doors down from hers, apparently returning to his own guest room with his suitcase in tow.

Mei ducked back into her suite, shut the door, and leaned her back against it. She closed her eyes as she caught her breath. Her heart pounded so hard; she felt it might burst right out of her chest.

She brought one hand up to her mouth to test how bad her morning breath was, and immediately wished she hadn’t. Mei rolled her eyes, humiliated that Kakashi had been exposed to it.

Then Mei exhaled, collecting herself. She stomped one foot and focused on her recent promise to herself. A shower, she needed a shower, so Mei ran to it, pulling her pajamas from her body as she did.

Her fight was about to begin, and Mei knew that she needed to act before assumptions, or overthinking, or anything else could get in her way again.


	25. Chapter Twenty-Four

Mei emerged from the shower feeling like a brand-new woman. She squeezed the excess water from her hair before wrapping it within a towel and then wrapped herself within her robe.

She congratulated herself for being so brilliant as to pack too much for her trip to Kumo as she exited the bath and headed for the closet in the bedroom.

It had gone dark enough that Mei needed to switch on a lamp. Fearing it was already late in the day, she looked out the window and found that a thick blanket of clouds had rolled in, bringing the threat of rain with them.

She jumped when her telephone rang. Mei turned away from her closet and crossed the sitting room of her guest suite to answer it.

“Oh, Lady Mei,” Kurenai said, sounding distressed after Mei had picked up.

“What is it?” Mei said, immediately concerned.

“I-I’m embarrassed to say it, but I’m afraid that I’ve meddled.” Kurenai cleared her throat before continuing, “I worry now that I was thinking more of my old friend than I did my new friend, and… I called Kakashi after we got off the phone last night.”

Mei smiled at the receiver, grateful to her new friend, and touched that she was worried. Before she could assure Kurenai that there had been no harm done, she caught sight of a folded piece of paper on the floor near the door of her guest suite. She was about to ask Kurenai to hold so she could collect it, but then a string of apologies and explanations erupted from the other end of the call.

“Kakashi had talked about you years ago, and I knew that you were important to him. I don’t know what happened between you two, and that’s none of my business, but, oh, it’s just that you both seemed so careful and aware of each other that I thought maybe…”

Mei moved the phone from one ear to the other as Kurenai continued. The telephone cord prevented her from walking too far, so she reached for the piece of paper, stretching her body, then her arm, then her fingers in order to grab it from the floor.

“… and I just couldn’t stand the idea that you were laboring under the misconception that Kakashi was romantically involved with Karin-which, thank goodness he’s not because I might’ve given _him_ a concussion if that’s where he was headed…Um, but he’s not! He’s not; they’re not, and, oh, it was _my_ fault that you thought they were…”

Mei had managed to retrieve the piece of paper from the floor while Kurenai chattered on. She unfolded it, and immediately recognized the handwriting she found inside.

“…And I’m so sorry for that, I should have been clearer, and now I’m sorry for meddling in your affairs without knowing how _you_ feel—”

“Thank you, Kurenai, for meddling and for caring about me,” Mei interrupted her and hoped that her voice carried the warmth she felt for her friend over the phone.

Kurenai went quiet for a moment. “You’re not angry?” She asked.

“Not at all,” Mei replied.

Kurenai sighed in relief. “You’re probably going to run into him there today if you haven’t already.”

“I have, and I need to get off the phone now so I can talk to him,”

“Oh! Of course, of course, I’ll let you go now—”

Kurenai was cut off suddenly, and another voice came on the line. “Call us as soon as you can to tell us what happened!” Gai sobbed into the phone.

“I will, I promise, but I really have to go now,” Mei chuckled and hung up the call.

Mei unfolded the note and read it. Her breath hitched as she brought one hand up to her chest.

She ran back to the bedroom and snatched her lucky blue dress. Once she had traded her robe for it, she ran again for the adjoining bath and pulled the towel off of her head. There was still no jutsu within her vast repertoire that could dry her hair, so she quickly wound it into a knot, and secured it to the top of her head. It wasn’t her first choice of hairstyle for such an important occasion, but her appearance had vastly improved since the last time Kakashi had seen her. With the note in hand, she ran for the door to her suite and out into the rain that had begun to fall on the Hidden Cloud Village.

She hadn’t got very far before the angry shout of a hot-tempered woman came from above her, “**You stop right there!**"

She looked up in time to jump out of the way of the most dangerous fist in the shinobi world. Tsunade landed in front of Mei; her punch pulled back a half-inch from the ground. Mei exhaled, relieved that it had just been a warning shot. Then she cringed at the scowl on her dear friend’s face.

“Tell me you haven’t accepted Ei’s proposal,” Tsunade growled.

“Exactly how far has this rumor traveled?” Mei huffed. “Of course, I haven’t.”

Tsunade relaxed her stance and her scowl. “I hope you’ve taken your shot at him because I can’t guarantee there will be anything left when I’m done with him.”

“Is that why you’re here?” Mei asked, then remembered her situation, “Actually, never mind, we’ll talk later—”

“I came with Kakashi, and we’ve spent the whole morning with Ei,” Tsunade interrupted her. “First, I went to Kiri because I was worried about you, but you had already left,” she raised her eyebrow disapprovingly at Mei. “Instead, I found Kakashi there, moping around the Hidden Mist Village.”

“What?” Mei asked in an astonished whisper.

“Yes. So we went back to Konoha together. Then, last night, I saw him heading for the train station with a crazed look on his face, or at least what I could see of it,” Tsunade muttered.

“Tsunade, please, I’m in a hurry,” Mei attempted to withdraw from the conversation, clutching the note she still had in her hand.

However, Tsunade continued to talk over her, “Now I’ve been waiting here to make sure that neither of you two skittish fools runs away without sorting this out! Kakashi took one look at me and ran in the opposite direction,” she cackled.

Mei clapped her free hand on her friend’s shoulder. “Where? Where did he go?” She asked frantically.

Tsunade smiled. “He ran that way,” she pointed to a small section of forest at the base of one of the mountains. “You’ll probably find him up a tree,” she shouted as Mei had already taken off running to it.

Mei could barely feel the raindrops pelting her face as she leaped to the forest. The words of the note that she carried echoed in her mind, driving her on.

_I can barely think, let alone write._

_A man cannot recover so easily from knowing the affections of a woman such as you. At least I cannot._

_On every occasion that I have thought of my future, I have envisioned you in it. Even now, when I plan, I plan for you._

_I know that what I’d done all those years ago is unforgivable, yet I still can’t help but wish that you could forgive me._

_I find myself daring to hope like I haven’t in so long. Tell me that the tenderness that was once between us isn’t lost._

_I’m going to go crazy if I stay in my guest room. I don’t know where I’ll go, but I’ll be at the concert tonight. I won’t leave Kumo until I know your answer._

_I understand that you’re expected to attend with Ei, but when you see me, please give me some hint of your thoughts. A word, even a look, would be enough to strengthen my hope or silence it forever._

_-K_


	26. Chapter Twenty-Five

Mei raced for the forest that Tsunade had pointed out. She sent chakra to her feet to secure her to the side of the mountain above it. Even with the benefit of jutsu, the rain had made the smooth, weathered side of it too slick to remain there for long, so she dropped down to the trees that made up the forest that wound around it.

She landed on a large branch and scanned the treetops in front of her, searching for him. Mei’s heart ached for a glimpse of Kakashi’s silver hair.

They’d danced around each other for far too long, so she pushed ahead, leaping through the trees. She didn’t want to keep him waiting until that evening for her answer. Mei didn’t want to keep Kakashi waiting for another moment.

She could hear the words of his letter as spoken by his voice in her mind. The possibility that he could still care for her had been her heart’s dearest wish and the only one that she’d been too afraid to hope for. Kakashi’s admission of his feelings dispelled all of her fears, and she was grateful that he’d been braver than she, putting himself in such a vulnerable position.

But that wasn’t the only part of his letter that spurred Mei on. She leaped from tree to tree, around and around the mountain, pushing herself faster and faster, barely blinking as she sought him out.

Why had he asked for _her_ forgiveness?

Her lungs burned when she reached the base of the mountain where the forest widened. Mei finally came to a stop in a small clearing within it. Her eyes searched the treetops, and her chest heaved as she panted from running so hard. She heard the soft thud of someone landing on the rain-soaked ground behind her, so she whipped around and came face-to-face with Kakashi.

They stood across from each other, staring into each other’s eyes as the storm poured down on them. When Mei had caught her breath enough to speak, she broke the silence.

“I’ve received your letter,” she said as she raised the hand that still held it. “Thank you, Lord Sixth,” Mei felt her whole body soften along with her voice as she expressed her gratitude.

Kakashi’s mask shifted around his mouth, but he remained silent. His pair of identical grey eyes searched hers so intensely that she wondered if he regretted the loss of the sharingan at that moment.

“That tenderness isn’t lost,” Mei breathlessly assured him. She lowered her hand and blinked her eyes at the raindrops that fell on her face.

Kakashi strode toward her, removing his vest as he did. When he was near enough to her, he held it above her head, sheltering her from the rain. With his vest removed, Mei could see the rise and fall of his chest as he breathed just as hard and fast as she. Though he still wore his mask, his eyes shone relief.

“And can you forgive me?” The question came quietly in his rich baritone voice and full of heartbreaking uncertainty.

It hung in the air between them for a moment while Mei tilted her head in confusion. “Forgive you for what?” She asked, looking up at him.

“F-for my selfishness,” Kakashi stuttered and swallowed thickly.

He closed his eyes in a pained expression. “You had the strength and ability to _change_ Kiri, and all I did was ask you to run away from it.”

Mei felt the air leave her lungs when he spoke of his assumed transgression. He opened his eyes again and continued.

“I’ve never underestimated you,” his voice came a little louder, “but it must’ve seemed that way. I’m sorry that I failed to give you the support that you needed from me.”

Mei swayed on the spot. She’d spent years convincing herself of his anger, his hatred toward her. In all that time, the idea that Kakashi would blame himself hadn’t even crossed her mind. She reached for him and fisted her hands in his shirt, further crumpling his letter.

“I have _never_ faulted you,” Mei whispered, overcome with emotion.

Kakashi blinked at her in disbelief.

Mei swallowed back the tears that threatened to fall from her eyes. “But if you still need my forgiveness, you have it.”

She heard his sharp exhale as if he’d held his breath. Creases formed around his eyes, betraying the smile that remained hidden behind his mask.

Mei drew in a shuddering breath and willed her voice to come stronger. “Can _you_ forgive _me_ for not meeting you that night?”

Kakashi’s eyes widened. “Of course!” He said it without any hesitation, and as if forgiving her was the simplest thing in the world. “Of course, I can,” he repeated.

Solace settled deep within Mei, and radiated outward; she felt she could crumple and collapse from relief.

Her gaze darted between Kakashi’s eyes and his covered lips. She brought one hand up and gently pulled his mask down. Mei stood on tiptoe, straining to reach him, cradling one side of his face in the palm of her hand.

“I’m sorry that I’ve kept you waiting for so long, Kakashi.” The most precious name she’d ever spoken had never tasted as good as when it finally fell from her lips again.

Kakashi craned his neck to lower his head when she couldn’t stretch any higher. “You are worth waiting for, Mei.”

The lovers pressed their mouths together, removing all distance and doubt between them. Their first kiss since their last kiss began tentatively, softly. Kakashi and Mei relaxed into each other, lips parting and moving in the sweetest and most familiar way.

Kakashi cast his vest aside and wrapped his arms around her, holding her tightly to him. Mei tugged at him in return, pulling him impossibly closer. The passion between them that had lain dormant for so long ignited once again. The pair broke apart, but only long enough for a wave of lava to emerge before it cooled and hardened in the rain, forming a dome around them.

There, in their own hidden space in which they had never been, or ever could be enemies, is where the lovers remained until the storm passed, reclaiming that which had been given up.


	27. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Join [The Kakashi Lounge Discord Server](https://discord.gg/fxyw3eB)   
To be a member, you must be:  
-at least 16 years old  
-able to play nice with others in a multishipping community

Mei closed her old, tattered diary after reading the page that marked the day that an important choice had been made. She returned it to the nightstand beside her bed and wrapped her arms around Kakashi.

“I can’t believe that’s what you thought all these years,” his voice rumbled softly. He laid on her, with his head beneath her chin. He played with her hair absentmindedly as he’d listened to her read the record of her private thoughts, occasionally turning his head to kiss her bare skin as she shared them. “I could never hate you,” he said and kissed her again.

For Mei, this was the crucial, final step toward healing the pain of the past.

She and Kakashi had been inseparable since their reunion in the Hidden Cloud Village. After the storm ended, they’d arrived hand-in-hand at the gallery wearing rumpled clothes and guilty smiles. Upon seeing them together, Tsunade forgave them for coming late to the concert that had been dedicated to her instead. Mei made it up to her by extending an invitation to join them on the ten-day tour of hot springs in Kiri. Ei glanced at them through the corner of one blackened eye but otherwise said nothing, much to Mei’s relief.

The pair took the first train to Konoha the following morning and had spent two weeks there, mostly in Kakashi’s bed. Kurenai hosted another dinner party, this time to celebrate Naruto’s becoming Hokage. When Gai wasn’t aggressively praising Uzumaki on fulfilling his youthful dream, he was sobbing over Kakashi and Mei’s reunion. Mirai took full advantage of his emotional state and defeated him soundly at his own challenge. He was still completing push-ups on one pinky finger, counting them off in his booming voice, providing the perfect cover for the lovers to sneak out early.

Mei was eager to return to Kiri when she learned that her proposal to have a temple built had been approved. Kakashi traveled with her to her home and scouted locations with her. A month had passed quickly in each other’s constant company; most of it spent wrapped around each other, making up for all the time they’d spent apart.

“How long did you wait that night?” Mei asked, even though she was afraid of his answer.

Kakashi sighed, pressing his face into her neck. “Until just before dawn, I didn’t want to risk being seen and mistook as a spy.”

Mei closed her eyes and ran her fingers through his hair in a soothing and sincere apology to him. “You must’ve been so angry with me,” she whispered.

“No, I was worried, not angry. I was afraid that something had happened to you,” he nuzzled his nose beneath her ear. “A week later, I heard that you had been nominated to be the Fifth Mizukage.”

“How?” Mei asked, leaning into his touch.

“A former ANBU subordinate told me. He’d been assigned to keep an eye on the movements of the Root Foundation that was led by Danzo. Lord Third suspected that he might order them into the forest that the Mist shinobi were hiding in.”

Mei’s eyes widened in horror at the thought of how close she and her comrades had come to danger. “We knew we were vulnerable to attack from anyone, and one from Konoha would’ve been devastating. That’s why we were so careful to remain outside the border.”

“Lord Third knew of some of the turmoil in the Hidden Mist. The moment he heard that Danzo was preparing to clear out those woods, he forbade it,” Kakashi tucked his head beneath her chin again.

“Had I known, I would’ve thanked him,” Mei spoke into the top of Kakashi’s head.

Then she pulled back, returning to her original train of thought. “I still can’t believe that you were _never_ angry with me.”

Kakashi cleared his throat, “I was angry that you didn’t attend that dinner the night before Naruto’s inauguration. But that’s my fault, not yours. I geared myself up to talk to you then, and was embarrassed that you never came.”

Mei closed her eyes to the memory of how anxious she’d been to attend that dinner. She chastised herself for having been so cowardly as to want to avoid him.

“I’m ashamed of my behavior at Kurenai’s the following evening,” Kakashi interrupted her thoughts.

“I was jealous,” Mei admitted. “Mission accomplished.”

Kakashi pushed himself up on his elbows to meet her eyes. “It was foolish, and I nearly ruined everything because of it. I don’t consider that an accomplishment.”

Mei traced her fingers along his forehead, brushing his silver cowlicks out of his eyes. “It was part of our journey; we’re here now, and that’s what matters.”

“I know, but I never want to risk losing this… losing _you_ again. I know it would be hectic,” he paused to swallow, “but when the tracks for the International Railway are finished in the Land of Water, it would be easy to spend time in each other’s villages and make homes for ourselves in each one.”

Mei’s hand stilled, and she felt her lips part in surprise. She held her breath as he continued.

“The era of peace makes it possible for us… I mean, it makes it possible for me to ask you if you would consider… being my wife.” Kakashi looked like he couldn’t believe that he managed to propose to her.

“Trust me; I’ve considered it,” Mei nodded with wide, unblinking eyes.

“Yes,” she smiled the word. Her excitement quickly increased at the happiness Mei found on Kakashi’s face.

“Yes, I will. And there is nothing—_nothing_,” she emphasized the word, “that could keep me from you ever again.”

** The End **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: This fanfic is an adaptation of my favorite Jane Austen novel: Persuasion.  
When I first started to write stories that paired Kakashi and Mei together, the idea of casting them in the roles of Captain Wentworth and Anne Elliot was too tempting for me to pass up. However, rather than pull them out of character in order to place them in Austen’s setting, I wanted to apply that story to the Narutoverse.  
In the original novel, Anne is persuaded to refuse Captain Wentworth because her family and friends disapprove of the match. In my story, I have Mei refusing Kakashi in order to become the Fifth Mizukage. Sacrifice, therefore, became the ongoing theme of this fic, and I extended it to every character within it.  
The women of Austen’s novels had marriage as their goal as opposed to career ambitions. By replacing persuasion with sacrifice, I was allowed to modernize the story a bit. Every woman of my acquaintance has struggled to balance their professional and personal lives (and I am no exception). I’m not a man, and I cannot speak for their experience, but as a woman with many female friends, I can vouch for the fact that women have a tendency to lose sight of themselves while meeting the expectations of their job, their family, etc.  
Friendships between women are at the forefront of all of Jane Austen’s novels, and so it is highlighted in my story as well. Austen’s heroines always travel, and so mine did too. I had an absolute ball imagining and writing the landscape and locations of interest in various nations that make up the Narutoverse (that hadn’t been elaborated upon in canon).  
Jane Austen’s stories always have a happy ending, so I made sure that Kakashi and Mei had one as well. They’d earned it by the end of the fanfic.  
I’d been dreaming this story up for nearly a year. I began writing it out this past July, and it has been the happy distraction that I’ve needed to help me through the loss of one parent, supporting the other as they learn to navigate their life without their spouse, home renovation projects, and various other IRL stresses. Then, I decided that completing this story would be my goal for NaNoWriMo 2019. I find myself happy to finish it instead of sad to part with it after it has carried me through so much in the last few months. This fic will always have a special place in my heart because I’d relied on it.  
At some point, I will come back to correct any errors that I may have missed before posting it online. I’m not a professional writer, so I make the mistakes of an amateur. Thank you for being kind enough to not point them out to me, haha.  
I hope that you have enjoyed reading this story, and if you have, please tell me so in the comments section. Your comments (on this fanfic in particular) are so important to me and bring me more happiness than I can say.  
Thank you for reading.  
XOXO  
Hima


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